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Thread: A movie review for a movie I haven't seen: Blood Diamond

  1. #1
    Sirc
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    Default A movie review for a movie I haven't seen: Blood Diamond

    From what I've seen of the previews I have come to the following review for this movie which I have not seen and probably won't see.

    Blood Diamond is probably about African sales of diamonds that are paid for by spilled blood and one diamond in particular, the blood diamond, the name of the movie being a double entendre, what clever writers they have. We have Leonardo DiCaprio as the dashing angsty cynic anti-hero and the black guy who is pure of heart and the love interest who melts his steel-cold heart. I venture to guess that something happens to black guy, say his family gets murdered/captured and DiCaprio has interest in black guy because black guy knows something about this diamond and DiCaprio has information about black guy's family or murderer of said family. Love interest lady Jennifer Connelly plays maybe a journalist or peace corp lady and wants a story or is naive enough to think she can change the whole country or both.

    There's an elaborate scheme to find this diamond and whatnot, with DiCaprio sharing a lot about his character's childhood or something dropping hints about why his character is the way he is throughout the movie. There's a lot of breaking racial barriers with scenes of black guy helping out DiCaprio and whatnot, showing that hey, Black people can do things just like white people, we should all get along.

    I bet at some point through this movie, DiCaprio starts showing more of his human side and probably dies in the end. Black guy gets his family back and/or avenges his family by ax'ing the murderer or bringing him to swift African justice. Connelly's character gets her story or becomes enlighten and decides to write a story for national geographic or something and then exposes the whole diamond trading fiasco thing to the world and thus showing that yes, one man, through a series of very very unlikely events, can change the world at the cost of a movie which could've fed millions in pre-production alone. And then we see a black person and a white person coming together showing that perhaps skin color isn't a barrier? Oh yeah there will also be a lot of anti-American propaganda in the movie scattered about, maybe even blaming the entire thing on Americans or at least a huge portion of it on them.

    So, how close am I?

  2. #2
    Shawarma
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    Imaginary writeup needs more ninjas, pirates, giant robotic undead mockingbirds and girls named Skip.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Question!'s Avatar
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    You are about 85% correct.

  4. #4
    Sirc
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    Quote Originally Posted by Question!
    You are about 85% correct.
    Yay!

  5. #5
    Will she be set upon you? jubei33's Avatar
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    well thats passing. I've taken some courses where that was an A. why don't you review some more shitbag movies

  6. #6
    Registered User Alex's Avatar
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    this movie was fucking awesome. zomg bodycount. dicaprio is a hottie.

  7. #7
    Registered Member AAAhmed46's Avatar
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    Dicaprio often doesn't get the credit he deserves.

  8. #8
    not long for this world nihilist's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AAAhmed46
    Dicaprio often doesn't get the credit he deserves.
    Something that most people don't know is that in hollywood, credit is directly proportional to the size of the wangus.


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