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View Full Version : ' Vampire ' Arrested And Charged With Vicious Assault



OZZ
18th August 11, 07:54 PM
Uh oh, next thing you know Bram Stoker's novel will be on the banned list of US High Schools..

http://ca.news.yahoo.com/vampire-arrest-sparks-discussion-pop-culture-141318411.html

Dark Helmet
18th August 11, 10:26 PM
jesus titty fucking christ!
http://l.yimg.com/bt/api/res/1.2/0Ib5xyHaFi6I5dxcUATUDg--/YXBwaWQ9eW5ld3M7Zmk9aW5zZXQ7aD00NTA7cT04NTt3PTMxNQ--/http://media.zenfs.com/en_us/News/Reuters/2011-06-05T033411Z_01_JWV10_RTRIDSP_2_COLOMBIA.jpg

Quick give Lebell her e-mail.

Ajamil
18th August 11, 11:41 PM
Very disingenuous of the site, really. Did you read the caption below the pic?
From the story:

as 19-year-old Lyle Monroe Bensley awaits a psychiatric evaluation in jail on burglary charges in Galveston, Texas.
And under the pic:

Mexican tattoo and body modification artist Maria Jose Cristerna, also known as …
Not the same person. Not even the same gender, and yet the implied association with pic and perp is definitely intentional.

Robot Jesus
19th August 11, 06:27 PM
I would still kill it to keep the hordes of mordor out.

Ajamil
19th August 11, 07:13 PM
Are those actual horns coming out of her forehead, or is that a camera trick?

Dark Helmet
19th August 11, 07:40 PM
No, there's this new fad where people have implants to look as much a social outcast as humanly possible. She must be their Queen.

Ajamil
19th August 11, 07:50 PM
No, I meant does she have something that's pushing her skin out into literal horns that protrude a good number of inches from her head, or are they more like lizard man's bumps and I'm seeing an illusion of camera angle?

resolve
19th August 11, 07:52 PM
Yeah the implants are not done by normal medical staff either. People usually go to get them put in by unlicensed surgeons without anesthesia (because you also have to have a license for that as well).

The actual pic of the "vampire" is this:

http://msnbcmedia3.msn.com/j/MSNBC/Components/Photo/_new/110818-Lyle-Monroe-Bensley-vsml-11a.grid-4x2.jpg

He claimed to be "500 years old" and asked to be detained because he would hurt the officers because he "needed to feed".

Looks like your run of the mill standard douchebag to me. Is that a Tapout shirt he's wearing?

Robot Jesus
19th August 11, 09:43 PM
they should force him to meet the dawn, and tape it. hopefully he's crazy enough that it will entertain me.

Fearless Ukemi
20th August 11, 07:29 AM
I wonder what must go through her parents' minds when she visits for holidays.

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
20th August 11, 09:19 AM
maybe they are happy to see their daughter and enjoy how little the neighbors bother them these days.
have you ever considered that she probably makes a fine living and has a lot of fun getting dressed in the morning?

Cullion
20th August 11, 09:26 AM
No, I meant does she have something that's pushing her skin out into literal horns that protrude a good number of inches from her head, or are they more like lizard man's bumps and I'm seeing an illusion of camera angle?

Yes, they're real. They're probably saline implants.

Here's more.
http://poundedink.com/

Ajamil
20th August 11, 11:44 AM
I just googled her name and got better images of the nubs. The first pic had me thinking they curved and were pointed, like a cows horns. Saline is one way to go, although that wears off after a while, doesn't it? I thought the forehead nubs were done by attaching surgical steel balls/whatev onto the forhead.

http://panicdots.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/VAMP_WOMAN_640.jpeg

A quick bio: (http://trulyparanormal.blogspot.com/2011/07/maria-hose-cristerna-mexican-vampire.html)



Maria Jose Cristerna A real Life Vampire who is also known as Mujer Vampiro or Vampire Woman ,Maria Jose a 35 years old Mexican Mom of four turned to body modification after years of domestic abuse from her husband. She was trained lawyer and she is from deep religious family background who married at the age of 17.




Maria Jose Cristerna has tattooed almost 100% of her body including her private parts and she also has titanium 'horns' implanted into her skull and dental implants that give her 'fangs'.




Maria Jose Cristerna said " The horns I have are symbol of strength and were implanted without anaesthetic .I had fangs done because I loved vampires as a little girl and I changed the color of my eyes so they were how I really wanted them to be. " she further adds" Tattooing is my way of being immortal, of really being a vampire and not dying - leaving my work on other people's skin"




Despite being a Real Life Freak she claims to be living a 'normal life' at her home in Mexico

And this...is this a before pic, or her daughter? The site has it with her name underneath...
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-_yydaI7mCGY/Tg8dx2V0iUI/AAAAAAAAO9c/-0XzaW2P9BU/s1600/Vampire_wanita_maria-jose-cristerna.jpg

Robot Jesus
20th August 11, 12:26 PM
when beautiful women make themselves ugly it's like slapping natural selection in the face with surgical steel.

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
20th August 11, 12:45 PM
when you get all you want in your struggles in life
then the world make you king for a day
go to the mirror and look at yourself
and see what that guy has to say
for it's not your mother, your brother, or your sister
whose judgement upon you must pass
the guy who counts most in your life is the guy staring back from the glass
he's the one to live up to cause he's with you
clear up to the end
to thine own self be true

420

OZZ
20th August 11, 04:14 PM
when you get all you want in your struggles in life
then the world make you king for a day
go to the mirror and look at yourself
and see what that guy has to say
for it's not your mother, your brother, or your sister
whose judgement upon you must pass
the guy who counts most in your life is the guy staring back from the glass
he's the one to live up to cause he's with you
clear up to the end
to thine own self be true

420

Being 'true to yourself' when you are stupid enough to make yourself look like that ?lol
Being true to yourself and a bit of sentimental nonsense will get you a fucking ham sandwich.

Ajamil
21st August 11, 12:25 AM
Being 'true to yourself' when you are stupid enough to make yourself look like that ?lol
So people should be true to themselves as long as you agree with it? You certainly have a right to mock the outcome and whatever person goes that way, but there's nothing wrong with independent decisions and satisfaction of the self.

The appeal to natural selection is not only wrong (mom of four), it's denying a crucial part of evolution: mutation.

She should have spent the money on therapy. Why? I bet she makes more money than you. And she's more famous.

OZZ
21st August 11, 11:33 AM
Why? I bet she makes more money than you. And she's more famous

So? Are these the things you prize most? Fame and fortune? Well, good for you..but I don't.

This woman is nothing more than an attention-seeking misfit with serious issues. I'm not going to debate the ' do what makes you happy and screw the rest of the world' BS with you Aj..
Glad you are back..btw.

Cullion
21st August 11, 12:31 PM
So? Are these the things you prize most? Fame and fortune? Well, good for you..but I don't.

Reread his post and think about who he was replying to.

Ajamil
21st August 11, 03:23 PM
I would definitely agree that what she did/does isn't normal, but what do you see as unhealthy? Her appearance more likely helps than hurts her profession, there might be family problems but they weren't reported so I wouldn't assume any. I think you are just put off by your expectations, and I'll admit I would be too.

Robot Jesus
21st August 11, 06:31 PM
Statistical infrequency
violation of norms
personal distress
disability or dysfunction
unexpectedness

does her behavior exhibit three of these?

Ajamil
22nd August 11, 01:10 AM
What is meant by statistical infrequency?

Robot Jesus
22nd August 11, 02:34 AM
it's not a difficult concept.

Ajamil
22nd August 11, 12:47 PM
What statistic are we watching? Infrequent within her own actions, or the actions of society? The latter seems covering under "violation of norms." If the former, I wouldn't say her actions are statistically infrequent. If it means some third option, then please enlighten me. Otherwise I'm only checking off one or maybe two of those signs.

KO'd N DOA
22nd August 11, 12:49 PM
I was in an 'artistic' phase when in my 5th high school. I was to mine own self be true, or so I thought.

One day my car broke down on a highway around 8 pm in the land before cell phone towers, and my friends and I had to walk for help. This immigrant, probably eastern european couple, refused to open the door, handed the phone to us. I called my dad, once done, they ordered us off the porch and off the property in broken english.

My dad picked us up, and laughed when i said they weren't very nice. He said, you are luckey you weren't shot. He had a good point. I stopped being so true to myself, and retired the artistic look.

Robot Jesus
22nd August 11, 01:14 PM
What statistic are we watching? Infrequent within her own actions, or the actions of society? The latter seems covering under "violation of norms." If the former, I wouldn't say her actions are statistically infrequent. If it means some third option, then please enlighten me. Otherwise I'm only checking off one or maybe two of those signs.


very high or low intelligence are statistically infrequent but do not violate norms. The point it that her behavior is both. And I would go with unexpectedness for the third. you've stated that her horns have helped her career, so not personal distress or dysfunction, but "get out of bad relationship, install titanium horns" is an unexpected response.

Ajamil
22nd August 11, 01:34 PM
What bad relationship? Edit: Reread. Forgot that part.

So is there an example of being outside norms that isn't statistically infrequent?

Robot Jesus
22nd August 11, 01:43 PM
that's the difference between masturbation in your room and on a park bench.

OZZ
22nd August 11, 08:17 PM
Reread his post and think about who he was replying to.

I know he was responding to NoB - but the question still stands. I appreciate the humor in asking MR.Materialism himself (NoB) such a question, but again, I am asking Aj for an answer, not you..
Who are you, his editor?
lol

Ajamil
22nd August 11, 08:40 PM
There are five basic goal categories in life: sensual pleasure, economic, fame/social standing, religious/ethical, and loving devotion to Krishna. I do not put a big emphasis on social or monetary goals, no.

Robot Jesus
22nd August 11, 10:27 PM
where would you put a desire to destroy all red Chinese?

Ajamil
22nd August 11, 10:34 PM
Either a territorial thing, which would be social in its patriotic sense, or a resources thing, which would be sensual. Fanaticism could be religious, but a race-based reason I would say is social.

Robot Jesus
22nd August 11, 10:42 PM
I just thought it would be easy, there are very few Indian immigrants to china, just something I could do given a year or two.

Spade: The Real Snake
29th August 11, 02:25 PM
I thought OZZ thought these fuckers were all cool and GQ smooth and get tons of pussy and shit.

OZZ
30th August 11, 08:47 AM
I thought OZZ thought these fuckers were all cool and GQ smooth and get tons of pussy and shit.

That's real vampires..not idiots who watch too many movies.

Spade: The Real Snake
30th August 11, 10:22 AM
so the idiots only get half as much pussy as real vampires, which is twice the pussy of a resolve

OZZ
30th August 11, 10:52 AM
True enough..
Alas, not all vampires are created equal. I don't know how well the Slav version from 30 Days of Night would fare in the singles bars..
http://www.answersfrommen.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/30-days-of-night-vampire.jpg
They were nasty vamps..and probably wouldn't make the best dinner guests. Unlike Gary Oldman's charming Vlad Dracul :
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_goZdMx4-0II/S0sv2_UyebI/AAAAAAAAAyo/iwAgMSdcSSo/s320/oldman_dracula.jpg
or Bela Lugosi's Count Dracula..
http://media.masslive.com/entertainment/photo/vampire-overkill-6591541jpg-2b876b24083b4d7c_large.jpg

I think one of my favorite-looking vampires is probably good ol' Kiefer from The Lost Boys
http://mestadelsbilder.files.wordpress.com/2009/10/kiefer-sutherland01.jpg?w=407&h=48
If you saw pictures of me from when I was 16-17 , you'd be amazed at how similar I looked to that character. Right down to the spikey hair and trenchcoat..

Robot Jesus
30th August 11, 10:13 PM
What about vincent chase

Tj9BH1BylPc

EvilSteve
31st August 11, 08:35 AM
so the idiots only get half as much pussy as real vampires, which is twice the pussy of a resolve

Mathematically that would imply that neither fake nor real vampires get any pussy.

Spade: The Real Snake
31st August 11, 10:08 AM
Mathematically that would imply that neither fake nor real vampires get any pussy.
STFU faggot, and feel my dark embrace.