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View Full Version : That's more like it: Pirates fawk with Royal Navy and get beaten down



Cullion
4th June 09, 02:09 AM
Somali pirates boarded by Royal Marines, have their shit confiscated and their boat blown up. Good show.

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2009/06/03/article-1190575-0531F8DD000005DC-569_634x403.jpg

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1190575/We-surrender-The-moment-Royal-Navy-captured-Somali-pirate-gang--blew-boat.html

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
4th June 09, 04:06 AM
that pirate ship sucks ass

bob
4th June 09, 04:20 AM
It has a very nice shade awning.

Anyway, it's good to see the British military has gone back to its roots by realising that it's much safer to cover yourself in glory against a parcel of poorly armed darkies.

jkdbuck76
4th June 09, 06:31 AM
The Royal Navy: ridding earth of its parasites. One. Boat. At. A. Time.

Lebell
4th June 09, 06:33 AM
they didnt even have a jolly roger flag and they call themselves pirates?!

FAIL.

bob
4th June 09, 06:36 AM
The most commonly used pirate flag was a plain black, which simply signified that no quarter would be asked or given.

Sun Wukong
4th June 09, 06:54 AM
More Royal Marine carnage photos. Personally, I think this was just a silly amount of over kill for a dime store raft.

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2009/06/03/article-1190575-0531D015000005DC-919_634x893.jpg

Yiktin Voxbane
4th June 09, 07:04 AM
This Suxx , brother got hated on fer making a living .... NOW how they meant to feed their Pirate wives and Pirate babies ?

Kein Haar
4th June 09, 07:16 AM
I bet they're wishing for a little colonialism about now.

"Hay gaiz...is it 2 late 2 come back??? Remembir wen u brought fakteries and hosptials and stuff? we shud do that agin!!"

Lebell
4th June 09, 07:17 AM
dude...im thinking sociocide pirate crew!!!

who's with me?

i get to be the captain cos its my idea.

Lebell
4th June 09, 07:18 AM
I bet they're wishing for a little colonialism about now.

"Hay gaiz...is it 2 late 2 come back??? Remembir wen u brought fakteries and hosptials and stuff? we shud do that agin!!"

i was saying that last night in a heavy discussion with some leftwinged guy.
he wouldnt have it eventhough two guys at the table came from third world countries and actually agreed with me.

Virus
4th June 09, 07:32 AM
I saw a documentary about Johannesburg and residents were saying that things were better under apartheid. Maybe they should ask if the Dutch can send some racists over to look after things for a bit.

billy sol hurok
4th June 09, 07:59 AM
This Suxx , brother got hated on fer making a living .... NOW how they meant to feed their Pirate wives and Pirate babies ?

Well, now the UK gots to give 'em asylum, which means extra dole for every rugrat they can produce.

/Virusbait

Lebell
4th June 09, 08:03 AM
I saw a documentary about Johannesburg and residents were saying that things were better under apartheid. Maybe they should ask if the Dutch can send some racists over to look after things for a bit.

I'd do it, i can speak a beekie Afrikaans.

Ajamil
4th June 09, 09:22 AM
"Pirates Fawk with Royal Navy"

What'd these guys do to get boarded?

KO'd N DOA
4th June 09, 09:26 AM
Kaaptain Lebell,

KO'd reporting for duty...Sir!

Resume-



Languages - I speak , French and English, and some Ki-Swahili...

Natality Canadian (like the Mossad, Jason Bourne, and Bruce Willis as the Jackal, all good pirates use Canadian Passports)

Boat Experience - Non no skills or sea experiance...but watched Sea Shaphard, now I want to do Piracy-

Some basic swiming skilz. Seals a phobic..

References Availible upon request..

Lebell
4th June 09, 10:14 AM
you're hired matey.

i want to go viking style on this one.
we steal a boat take it towards the somalian coasts and start pillaging their villages and raping their wimminz yelling:SUPRISE ITS REVENGE OF THE WHITE MANTIEM!!!!!!! HOW DO YOU LIKE THIEZZZZZZZ???

Then we enslave their children, sell em to iran or saoudia and set fire to their villages.
if we cant sell the kids we can always eat them.

ignatzami
4th June 09, 10:45 AM
*clicks heels*

Seaman First Class Ignatz Reporting for Duty!



Languages - I speak , English, C/C++, Java, Perl, PHP, C#

Nationality: U.S.A. WHOO-AH!

Boat Experience - Sailing, Kayaking, Canoing, Small motorized boats, Speed boats

Basic engine maintenance. Fencing skillz, Good swimmer, lifts heavy things.

References Availible upon request..

WarPhalange
4th June 09, 11:10 AM
More Royal Marine carnage photos. Personally, I think this was just a silly amount of over kill for a dime store raft.

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2009/06/03/article-1190575-0531D015000005DC-919_634x893.jpg

Fail. The bomb they used to explode the ship probably cost more than any damages the pirates have done, unless somehow the Brits found a way to have the military not spend a redonkulus amount of money on something relatively simple. Plus, they totally polluted the ocean with that shit. Drilling a few holes in the boat would have been far simpler. Hell, just shoot it with a few bullets and that will have the same effect. Bullets are much cheaper than bombs.

Ajamil
4th June 09, 11:22 AM
That was a bomb? From the splashes in front, I thought it was like every single exploding vehicle in Airwolf.

Kein Haar
4th June 09, 11:29 AM
Airwolf...OH SHIT.

Airwolf vs. Blue Thunder!!!????11//

Totemicist
4th June 09, 11:32 AM
Languages - I speak , Basic French, English and Moroccan

Nationality British and Moroccan (like all good pirates I have 2 Passports)

Boat Experience - I was a sea cadet and I once restored a clinker built dinghy so I have some shipwrighting skills (It may well have sunk but this is not important).

I qualified as a pool lifeguard at 15 and promptly abused my position shamelessly until sacking happened.

References: I am british with viking and moroccan blood so I am made of pirate.



Is it time to nail a priest to his church yet?

Lebell
4th June 09, 12:20 PM
fuckin saracens...


oh well i guess you're hired aswell.
but no calls for prayer or ill kick your heathen ass overboard, those sounds gimme the creeps.

so far we got captin Lebell, Kod, ignitzami and totemicist.

we need scary nicknames.

Lebell
4th June 09, 12:24 PM
okay since you are maroccan, i have to tell this joke.

slight derail but here we go.

a maroccan guy, a dutch guy, a french guy, a swiss guy, and an italian guy are sharing a wagon on a train.

the french guy grabs a bottle of wine, takes one sip and throws the bottle out of the window.

wtf? ask the other guys, why did you do that for?!
ah im am french, where im from we have plenty of those winebottles...

the swiss guy takes a look at his watch and chucks it out of the window aswell.
im swiss we got plenty of clocks and watches where im from!

the italian takes one bite out of his pizza and throws it away aswell.
plenty of pizzas in italy!

so the guys now look at the dutch guy....well?
the dutch guy looks around and the maroccan screams: DONT EVEN FUCKING THINK ABOUT IT!!!

Spade: The Real Snake
4th June 09, 12:39 PM
For some reason the thread title made me think the pirates were all wearing V for Vendetta masks.

Ajamil
4th June 09, 02:56 PM
6674
Better?

Spade: The Real Snake
4th June 09, 02:58 PM
^^^
I will be owing U some raep.....errr.....rep.

Cullion
4th June 09, 04:13 PM
Anyway, it's good to see the British military has gone back to its roots by realising that it's much safer to cover yourself in glory against a parcel of poorly armed darkies.

That be your military too.

Cullion
4th June 09, 04:16 PM
Fail. The bomb they used to explode the ship probably cost more than any damages the pirates have done, unless somehow the Brits found a way to have the military not spend a redonkulus amount of money on something relatively simple. Plus, they totally polluted the ocean with that shit. Drilling a few holes in the boat would have been far simpler. Hell, just shoot it with a few bullets and that will have the same effect. Bullets are much cheaper than bombs.

Pirates in the region aren't lifting tourists wallets, they're taking entire cargo ships to ransom. They blew the boat to pieces to make sure it was nice and dramatic for showing on satellite channels they watch on the East Coast of Africa as a warning.

Harpy
4th June 09, 05:37 PM
*cheers for the Royal Navy*

I like the overkill approach (in fact, why didn't they just 'accidently' kill the pirates). Sets a tone for wannabe-pirates to consider.

Fearless Ukemi
4th June 09, 08:43 PM
I like how you think. I didn't think you had it in you.

Neildo
4th June 09, 08:52 PM
that was probably just a well placed grenade near the boats fuel tank. it's not like they used a cruise missile on it.

Harpy
4th June 09, 08:56 PM
I like how you think. I didn't think you had it in you.

You'd be surprised.

Of course I do enjoy the romanticism of the 'pirate life' but these Somalis are definitely not the real thing.

Keith
4th June 09, 10:08 PM
Pirate resume:

Languages: American

Nationality: American

Experience: 5 years, 5 months in the US Navy (3 years 7 months sea time), electronics and weapons handling experience, basic welding, basic seamanship, boat handling, strong swimmer.

and fuck you, I'm the fucking captain.

Yiktin Voxbane
5th June 09, 12:13 AM
Just like to point out, real crew are press-ganged not selected on the various qualities of their current CV ...

Errm, I mean , Yarrgghh !

theotherserge
5th June 09, 12:43 AM
Pirate resume:

Languages: American

Nationality: American

Experience: 5 years, 5 months in the US Navy (3 years 7 months sea time), electronics and weapons handling experience, basic welding, basic seamanship, boat handling, strong swimmer.

and fuck you, I'm the fucking captain.
sounds like a character I had in Traveller, only I think he had a higher SOC.

Keith
5th June 09, 02:45 AM
sounds like a character I had in Traveller, only I think he had a higher SOC.
Well it's kind of flattering that I could be cool enough to be someone's RPG character.

What does SOC stand for?

bobyclumsyninja
5th June 09, 02:59 AM
Captian Bobbles McChesspiece reporting. Get it straight landlubbers, ahm takin the ship, by right of GOD (and me flinklock).

Language: Mildly Piratey Queen's English circa 1770.
Naval experience: Brighton beach...built a sandcastle, but it flooded.
Nationality: English. Up the empire!
Military experience: Seen every episode of the A-team
Skillz: Very good at pushing people into the pool...or off boats!

By right of the crown (Queen E-dog, the head Liznatch of the high seas) I claim this vessel, and impound all of it's arms, and cargo.

I hereby also commandeer and press into service, all present, and direct to them to HMS Lebell-in-a-dingy. Make your mark there, on the tablet...well...except you Lebell, you leave marks wherever you go, you filthy Dutchman.

We set sail at once, for Africa's east coast, where we'll plunder the Royal Navy's sandwiches, and pickled egg stash. From there we aim Lebell south (you're the mast, by the way, you lanky skalliwag) and pillage our way down the coast.

Now who want's to climb the mast (Lebell) to the crow's nest as lookout?
*everyone jumps overboard*

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
5th June 09, 03:13 AM
Who said you get to be captain? Take off my hat and stop shoveling the hardtack into your mouth tubby.

Lebell
5th June 09, 03:33 AM
dudes it was my idea to form a pirate gang, i get to be the captain.

we also need a ships wench for when we get lonely at sea.

Lily?

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
5th June 09, 04:11 AM
i would go sexless before i used that skank

Lebell
5th June 09, 04:19 AM
im doubting myself, it can get pretty lonely out there, besides at ful sea, its not like someone 's going to see it, right?

EuropIan
5th June 09, 05:17 AM
Lebell wants a "jolly rogering"

socratic
5th June 09, 07:24 AM
i was saying that last night in a heavy discussion with some leftwinged guy.
he wouldnt have it eventhough two guys at the table came from third world countries and actually agreed with me.

Of course you are pro-colonialism, the only time your stupid country was ever relevant was when it shat on a bunch of Malays, who you stole from the Spaniards and Portuguese because you couldn't capture anything yourselves.A nd you weren't even very good at that, because you got your asses outmaneuvered by the British and then the Americans, and then the Japanese, who you were originally 'mastering' over until the Americans came, even though they got to treat your guys like shit. Oh, and you guys gave me a bunch new katakana words to learn, thanks, assholes.

And with blowing up the boat- I thought everyone knew that Shock and Awe doesn't actually work? What, it's a good idea now that the British are doing it? If they wanted to get the job done properly they would have just shot the pirates and sunk the boat. Tie the corpses to the boat if you're really worried about them getting found.

Lebell
5th June 09, 10:56 AM
Of course you are pro-colonialism, the only time your stupid country was ever relevant was when it shat on a bunch of Malays, who you stole from the Spaniards and Portuguese because you couldn't capture anything yourselves.A nd you weren't even very good at that, because you got your asses outmaneuvered by the British and then the Americans, and then the Japanese, who you were originally 'mastering' over until the Americans came, even though they got to treat your guys like shit. Oh, and you guys gave me a bunch new katakana words to learn, thanks, assholes.
.

dude....im only pro colonialism because it would be in those peoples best interest.

you also have a weird view on dutch history.
allow me: after wtfpwning the spanish we started on our own.
the french and british attacked simultaneously and still couldnt win.
then we acquired, yes ACQUIRED some pieces of land we legally exploited.

you see unlike the spanish and portugese who went in with cannons, and bringing the love of christ with the sword and torture, the dutch went in, looked around for the best land and made friends with the local rulers.
local rulers who were too stupid to understad they were sitting on a goldmine because they were too busy oppressing their subjects.

so the dutch got themselves some colonies, had fun with the local wimminz without preaching christianity and made some good money of off it.

how is that bad?

then after spreading our awesomeness the pesky britts started bullying us again, by that time they were the superpower.
so we traded new amsterdam for an entire country in south america (thanks stupids! lol!) and called it quits.
The britts pretty much left us alone because they were too busy shipping their scum out to some colony near indonesia...ehr..what was the name again?

bobyclumsyninja
7th June 09, 06:59 AM
shat out by lebell dude....im only pro colonialism because it would be in those peoples best interest.

mmm no. One of the british lords back in the day, summed it up quite well.

"we didn't take(invade/occupy, I forget the term) India for the Indians"

Colonialism is shit. It's never ever about 'those people'. It's about the possessions of 'those people' and exploiting them. It's kinda simple-minded to applaud what you'd never ever submit to yourself.

The Americans who think Iraqis should be thankful for the utter demolition of their infrastructure, should consider how they'd respond to a shock and awe campaign on US soil.

And you Dutchie, should remember your shit almost became a colony of the third reich. Heil missing-the-obvious Hitler eh?

bobyclumsyninja
7th June 09, 07:00 AM
I still lub you though...you daft, but lubable troll.

Lebell
7th June 09, 08:37 AM
colonialism had its good sides like christianity, schooling and health care.
people who fail to see that are ingrates.

' waargh!! the white men stole those peoples resources!!'

uhm...those resources were still in the soil, the dudes were sitting on them for hundreds of years and didnt figure out how to use it.
if they werent going to do anything with those resources the white guys did.

then the people let the colonials do all the hard work for them, they realise it generates money and only at that point they go: hey!! hang on!! we deserve that wealth!

in short: get a jub!!!!

Ajamil
7th June 09, 02:17 PM
Vedic thought said the resources didn't belong to the Indians anyway, so they can't complain that someone else is using them.

bobyclumsyninja
7th June 09, 11:09 PM
^^^That's what the fuck in a bottle right there...with buttons on. (I don't know what that means, I did three gigs in three days 11 hours of singing/guitar, I'm wiped).

Sun Wukong
7th June 09, 11:20 PM
dudes it was my idea to form a pirate gang, i get to be the captain.

we also need a ships wench for when we get lonely at sea.

Lily?


The sea madness has him, somebody kill him before his insanity spreads. He'd want it that way.

socratic
8th June 09, 12:51 AM
dude....im only pro colonialism because it would be in those peoples best interest.

you also have a weird view on dutch history.
allow me: after wtfpwning the spanish we started on our own.
the french and british attacked simultaneously and still couldnt win.
then we acquired, yes ACQUIRED some pieces of land we legally exploited.

By 'acquired' you mean 'took from the Spanish and Portuguese because we were too pussy to do it ourselves'. Your whole troll shtick is cute sometimes, blondie, but now's not really one of those times. Why not do something else? I bet there's a nice blonde beer and some buttsecks just waiting for you down the club. Mind the brown people though, they're SCARY, aren't they?


you see unlike the spanish and portugese who went in with cannons, and bringing the love of christ with the sword and torture, the dutch went in, looked around for the best land and made friends with the local rulers.
local rulers who were too stupid to understad they were sitting on a goldmine because they were too busy oppressing their subjects.

Uh, no, that was the Spanish. They were the catholics. Your people were Calvanists and had no real interest in religious influence, which is why your linguistic and cultural influence on colonies died out incredibly fast after you got WTFpwned by the Japanese/locals/British. Ironically your total failure to have a cultural influence is what allowed your nation to trade with Japan, since after sokaku took effect they lost interest in trading with active Christians.


then after spreading our awesomeness the pesky britts started bullying us again, by that time they were the superpower.
so we traded new amsterdam for an entire country in south america (thanks stupids! lol!) and called it quits.
The britts pretty much left us alone because they were too busy shipping their scum out to some colony near indonesia...ehr..what was the name again?

You lost all of the East Indies by WW2 [Indonesia being the last to go...], Sri Lanka well before then, Africa and India well before then, Japan by the end of sokaku [way to lose your one semi-profitable claim to Japanese lacquer to the AMERICANS], Australia because you were too pissweak to enforce your claim anyway... You guys got out-played in every colonial theatre you were in. Shit, even the Spaniards had you whipped in South America. What, one country? Wow. Nice work. One out of an entire continent dominated by the Spanish.

Linguistically, very few places in the world contain Dutch influence. Honestly Japanese and Bahasa Indonesia (Malay, sorta) are the only two that are worth sitting down and examining, and in the case of Bahasa Indonesia your lingual influence is fast losing what little ground it had to English, Arabic and Sanskrit [which cumulatively are way more influential than Dutch was anyway]. In Japanese the overall influence of Dutch is probably less than Spanish anyway, and once again is losing ground to English loanwords.

You haven't been relevant to the global community since the 19th century. How's it feel to be a nobody?

Tanhalen21
8th June 09, 01:12 AM
I saw a documentary about Johannesburg and residents were saying that things were better under apartheid.

Having lived with my family in a bantustan during apartheid I'm going to have to disagree with this one.

socratic
8th June 09, 01:32 AM
Having lived with my family in a bantustan during apartheid I'm going to have to disagree with this one.

Nothing is ever 'better', it's just becomes a different kind of shitty.

KO'd N DOA
8th June 09, 10:20 AM
Nothing is ever 'better', it's just becomes a different kind of shitty.

I totally disagree with you on this one.

We will not only be Better Pirates than those before, we are going to set the bar of Better so high, they will refer to us as the Golden Age. I am doing some research on being a modern day pirate.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yw3IhRGGxwM&feature=related

Ajamil
8th June 09, 11:07 AM
^^^That's what the fuck in a bottle right there...with buttons on. (I don't know what that means, I did three gigs in three days 11 hours of singing/guitar, I'm wiped).

...I can't tell if you approve or disapprove.

Spade: The Real Snake
8th June 09, 11:11 AM
...I can't tell if you approve or disapprove.

He's a Brit living in Boston.
Of course he loves him some Colonialism.

bobyclumsyninja
8th June 09, 12:24 PM
huh?

whenever someone praises colonialism (not technological exporting) I hear the Benny Hill song playing in the background.

Lebell
9th June 09, 04:52 AM
By 'acquired' you mean 'took from the Spanish and Portuguese because we were too pussy to do it ourselves'.

yeah because taking land from the Spanish was a no thing right?
' Hi Spanish empire! we're dutch, we'll have your colony plz!'
' oh you're dutch? ghee...we build these fortresses with garrisons to protect profitable colonies...we'd like to keep them but since you ask for it...here you go!'

LOL.



Your whole troll shtick is cute sometimes, blondie, but now's not really one of those times. Why not do something else? I bet there's a nice blonde beer and some buttsecks just waiting for you down the club. Mind the brown people though, they're SCARY, aren't they?

Blondie?
hey, mr P.C. are you aware you are making remarks considering my ethnicity?
oh thats right you're a selfloathing white guy with a guiltcomplex..carry on. ;-)




Uh, no, that was the Spanish. They were the catholics. YOUR PEOPLE were Calvanists and had no real interest in religious influence, which is why your linguistic and cultural influence on colonies died out incredibly fast after you got WTFpwned by the Japanese/locals/British. Ironically your total failure to have a cultural influence is what allowed your nation to trade with Japan, since after sokaku took effect they lost interest in trading with active Christians.

this is funny shit from someone coming from a penal island.
no influence whatsoever?
Indonesia until 1948, Suriname until the 70ies, chunk in the carrabean as we speak.
get someone russian in this thread, he could tell you many naval terms in russian derived from dutch, also japanese words.




You lost all of the East Indies by WW2 [Indonesia being the last to go...], Sri Lanka well before then, Africa and India well before then, Japan by the end of sokaku [way to lose your one semi-profitable claim to Japanese lacquer to the AMERICANS], Australia because you were too pissweak to enforce your claim anyway... You guys got out-played in every colonial theatre you were in. Shit, even the Spaniards had you whipped in South America. What, one country? Wow. Nice work. One out of an entire continent dominated by the Spanish.

Linguistically, very few places in the world contain Dutch influence. Honestly Japanese and Bahasa Indonesia (Malay, sorta) are the only two that are worth sitting down and examining, and in the case of Bahasa Indonesia your lingual influence is fast losing what little ground it had to English, Arabic and Sanskrit [which cumulatively are way more influential than Dutch was anyway]. In Japanese the overall influence of Dutch is probably less than Spanish anyway, and once again is losing ground to English loanwords.

yadda yadda.
what you miss is the point that such a small country has been able to do all of these things as long as they could.
you seem to be a bit of the blood and soil kinda guy, us and they and you guys etc.
so tell me, what was australia all about anyway?


You haven't been relevant to the global community since the 19th century. How's it feel to be a nobody?

LOL!
you fail to understand that the dutch arent known to be nationalistic, we dont do national pride, are you really this childish?
'your country sucks, therefor you suck too!'

im a nobody?
then following your logic africans are nobodies,south americans are nobodies, chunks of asia are nobodies.

you feeling stupid yet?
you should.

Lebell
9th June 09, 04:54 AM
OWNED!

bobyclumsyninja
9th June 09, 06:38 AM
d-d-d- do do d-d-d- do do d-d-d

OZZ
9th June 09, 03:04 PM
dude...im thinking sociocide pirate crew!!!

who's with me?

i get to be the captain cos its my idea.

Ok..I'll start the mutiny right now.

KO'd N DOA
16th June 09, 12:00 PM
Captain Labelle just overan the socratic and just planted his pirate flag on his mast...wonder where this adventure will go next.

Ozz, are you serious about a Mutiny? More Canadians think this song captures our Pirate heritage, than the one we pretend to sing when the Queen comes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dl-CfQvz21Y&feature=related

bobyclumsyninja
16th June 09, 10:44 PM
We can all have our own ships, that way we can sink Lebell the second we leave dry land, and leave him like the Mary Rose, in the harbor to rot, and one day be dredged up, but mysteriously sank again, as a sort of joke, but us, in our insane dotage.

Yiktin Voxbane
16th June 09, 10:46 PM
^LOL^

Lebell
17th June 09, 06:04 AM
you bunch of ingrate fuckers.

go ahead! i dont need you!

ill roam the seas in the ss Awesomeness and spread terr0r and std's around like candy!
guess it takes a real man to run with Captain Lebell.

Kein Haar
17th June 09, 06:08 AM
Since you don't have any crew left...

...can my wife and I pay you for a sunset cruise?

You have to make hors d'oeuvres though.

Lebell
17th June 09, 10:08 AM
a pirate's gotta start somewhere.


sure, ill make hors d' oeuvres.
you want me to serve those naked?

Ajamil
17th June 09, 10:46 AM
Always the naked with you. Salt spray will seriously chaff after a while.

Lebell
17th June 09, 11:20 AM
god you're such a pussy sometimes.

Kiko
17th June 09, 07:41 PM
I'm so glad I missed this.

*pours Yiktin a rum*

Yiktin Voxbane
17th June 09, 08:51 PM
;D

OZZ
17th June 09, 09:19 PM
you bunch of ingrate fuckers.

go ahead! i dont need you!

ill roam the seas in the ss Awesomeness and spread terr0r and std's around like candy!
guess it takes a real man to run with Captain Lebell.

Walk the plank..ya scurvy dawg..arr!!

bobyclumsyninja
27th June 09, 11:31 PM
Lebell's punishment at sea doesn't involve a plank, but it still manages to be worse than death.

resolve
28th June 09, 12:14 AM
I'm going to use this thread as the inspiration for something great! You'll see the results in a year's time.

Lebell
28th June 09, 07:52 AM
captain Lebell wtfpawning your oiltankers, scourge of the Aiden Gulf, supreme Warlord of the Somalian coasts.

yeah it has a nice ring to it...

sochin101
28th June 09, 08:02 AM
So, wait, I join the navy, I get to stay on a ship with lots of like-minded individuals, wear bell-bottoms AND shoot Lebell?

Deal.

Lebell
28th June 09, 08:44 AM
Dude, i would be one the most cunning strategists that ever roamed the seas.
i'd probably steal your frigate from right under your ass and you'd never notice it.

Lebell
28th June 09, 08:55 AM
true story:

one time i was invading Carthage with meh greek dudes.
so i split my armies in two, one part is one third the second part 2 thirds of my original army.
The smalles part lies siege on Carthago.

The second one is hiding more away from the city.

' next turn' bottun.

Yes...the enemy responded according to plan, they send a relief force to break the siege, unfortuately i was planning and building up an armada so every carthaginian port is effectively blocked, my enemy cant train/afford good troops.

the relief force is easily dealt with.

next turn button.


my enemy is getting desperate and sallies forth from Carthago, i withdraw my troops, they follow me on the plains.
this is where they found out where they found themselves between the anvil (1 third elite troops) and the hammer (remaining 2 third army with loads of artillery/archers)
after annihilating the enemy i return to lay siege again with my smaller army group.

My larger army group is pestering Cathago's northern cities like Utica, blocking ports with a small cavalery unit drawing armies from the cities which get destroyed by my armygroup.

my fleet is free and begins a wtfpawning fest with cathaginian navy who still is in the process of grouping up to larger fleets.

next turn button.

im laying siege on 4 cities now,ive sappers on the walls for carthago and utica only has 2 units of auxilary troops.

now all the portblocking troops return to the army group for maximal strength, after all there could be hostile forces around who want to use the situation to their advantge.
(im looking at the numidians, bunch of bastards)

next turn button.

carthaginian navy attacks my superawesome navy full of experienced triremes and even quintiremes and they get slaughtered.
no more navy for carthage.
i send navy off to block Caralis and Palma the last remaining pockets.

Carthage falls (exterminate population)

Utica falls (battletime 4 minutes, LOL)

I'll just sit the other two cities out.

i begin building up my barracks, retrain my troops and build up a second army group to invade those friggin ptolemaic fagg0ts.





am i a military genius or what?

Dark Helmet
28th June 09, 10:19 AM
Which game was that?

Lebell
28th June 09, 10:26 AM
rome total war with the total realism mod.