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View Full Version : Break out your hockey pads, all you wanna-be vigilantes.



cuatro76
28th April 09, 12:24 PM
This article is about 10% inspirational, 90% face-palm. While this guy's efforts to help fight crime in Cincinnati and feed the homeless are to be supported, the LARPtastic way in which he and his Avenger posse conduct themselves makes you wish Frank Castle wasn't just in comic books. (Check out the video in the link for the full effect)

http://www.wlwt.com/cnn-news/19305002/detail.html

Cincinnati Superhero Patrols Streets Fighting Crime

'Shadowhare' Among Nationwide Group Of Superheroes

Eric Flack ([email protected])
Reporter


CINCINNATI -- Cincinnati police have a new ally in their fight against crime, whether they want it or not.

He calls himself Shadowhare, and he wears a mask and a cape to conceal his true identity. He's Cincinnati's own version of a superhero fighting crime and injustice where he finds it.

"We help enforce the law by doing what we can in legal standards, so we carry handcuffs, pepper spray all the legal weapons," said Shadowhare. "We will do citizen's arrests. We will intervene on crimes if there is one happening in front of us."

The man behind Shadowhare's mask is 21 years old and from Milford. Those are the only clues to his true identity that he will reveal. Shadowhare said he was abused as a child and grew up in foster homes, perhaps leading him to a life helping others.

"My message to Cincinnati is that there is still hope and all we have to do is stand together," he said.

Shadowhare is not alone in his quest to fight crime. He heads up a group of men -- and one woman -- called the "Allegiance of Heroes." The members communicate with each other in online forums. Among the members are Aclyptico in Pennsylvania, Wall Creeper in Colorado and Master Legend in Florida.

"I've even teamed up with Mr. Extreme in California -- San Diego -- and we were trying to track down a rapist," said Shadowhare.

The crime fighters will often pair up to patrol the streets. Even so, fighting crime comes with its share of hardship.

Shadowhare said he suffered a dislocated shoulder two years ago while trying to help a woman who was being attacked.

And the authorities don't always take him seriously. In one encounter with a Hamilton County corrections officer, Shadowhare was greeted with a chuckle and a look of disbelief.

But Shadowhare said he and his team are not deterred by the criticism. He remains focused on trying to make Cincinnati a better place, whether it's fighting crime or feeding the homeless.

For now, the law is on Shadowhare's side.

It is legal in Ohio and Kentucky to make a citizens arrest, however, the arrester does face possible civil litigation if the person arrested turns out to be innocent.

MrBadGuy
28th April 09, 12:37 PM
I wonder if "The Lightning Fister!" is still available...


Also, I wonder if they ever pick and choose which crimes to deal with.


"Oh shit...that guy has a gun....Ooh, look, a litterbug! LEAGUE OF HEROES, DESCEND!"

Robot Jesus
28th April 09, 12:38 PM
the name shadowhare makes me think of watership down


All the world will be your enemy, Prince with a Thousand Enemies. And whenever they catch you, they will kill you. But first, they must catch you,

Shawarma
28th April 09, 12:39 PM
Shadowhare said he was abused as a child and grew up in foster homes, perhaps leading him to a life helping others.
Enough said, I think.

cuatro76
28th April 09, 12:41 PM
Or maybe he's protecting his identity with a false back story.

Yiktin Voxbane
28th April 09, 02:05 PM
He'll turn out to be a Bona-fide shit eating kiddy fiddler .

Shawarma
28th April 09, 02:08 PM
I think Molestor would be a great supervillain name.

mrm1775
28th April 09, 02:39 PM
I have family in Cincy. I will sleep better at night knowing that Shadow Hare is out there.

OZZ
29th April 09, 10:44 AM
I want to be a super- hero too..
But I'm too busy.
I think these fellows have watched WATCHMEN a few too many times..

Spade: The Real Snake
29th April 09, 12:39 PM
Shadowhare = jkdbuck76.

You read it here first.

Spade: The Real Snake
29th April 09, 12:43 PM
And here is the website for the World SuperHero Registry.


Angle-Grinder Man = WIN!

http://www.worldsuperheroregistry.com/world_superhero_registry_gallery.htm

OZZ
29th April 09, 02:33 PM
And here is the website for the World SuperHero Registry.


Angle-Grinder Man = WIN!

http://www.worldsuperheroregistry.com/world_superhero_registry_gallery.htm

Shit..do they ALL have to be skinny nerds?
The average criminal who has spent some time behind bars has more than likely pumped a little iron. Maybe these geeks ought to remember that and take some time to get in shape before they go saving the world.

KO'd N DOA
29th April 09, 03:00 PM
http://www.worldsuperheroregistry.com/BA.jpg

Spade: The Real Snake
29th April 09, 03:24 PM
^^
I thought the exact same thing.
But I see "you-know-who" as more a supervillian.

MrBadGuy
29th April 09, 03:55 PM
Is that TheMightyMcClaw?

Spade: The Real Snake
29th April 09, 04:02 PM
With arms that big?

bob
29th April 09, 04:42 PM
I for one believe Shadowhore is an excellent superhero concept.

Harpy
29th April 09, 09:32 PM
Snake Plissken = Citizen Prime

I don't have enough time to look at that website but its hilarious yet heart-warming.

Dagon Akujin
29th April 09, 10:27 PM
His MySpace (yeah, I know) has links to a whole bunch of his costumed friends.

http://www.myspace.com/shadow_hare



http://c4.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/28/m_5208e7b3ca874b5aa74a6bd964c401ff.jpg

Spade: The Real Snake
29th April 09, 11:28 PM
Snake Plissken = Citizen Prime

I don't have enough time to look at that website but its hilarious yet heart-warming.
SHHHHH!

SEKRIT EYEDENTYTY!

fbat
1st May 09, 01:00 PM
After going through the entire World Superhero Registry, I'm convinced that I must become a supervillain.

I will become "Dr. Reality". My only duties will be to plague all superheroes with job applications, business casual attire, utility bills, pictures of happy families, and tax return forms.

Beware ShadowHare... for Dr. Reality is here.

kracker
2nd May 09, 06:39 PM
After going through the entire World Superhero Registry, I'm convinced that I must become a supervillain.

I will become "Dr. Reality". My only duties will be to plague all superheroes with job applications, business casual attire, utility bills, pictures of happy families, and tax return forms.

Beware ShadowHare... for Dr. Reality is here.

I love how they call themslves "Real Life Superheros." We need someone to explain the meaning of real life to them.

Scrapper
2nd May 09, 08:31 PM
I am SOOOOOOOO gonna be a superhero.

i will be known as:
Tactical MAN!

I will wear kevlar from head to toe, carry 2934856 guns, 578 knives, and a gallon of bear mace. I will patrol the streets of Eastern CT protecting it's citizens from...er...crickets, peep frogs, and coyotes I guess. Of course, I will be indistinguishable from damn near anyone else out after dark in Eastern CT that way.

Toby Christensen
3rd May 09, 02:09 AM
Conventional Man has NO super powers, works stuffing envelopes and lives in a one room flat.

At night (or on other obscure occasions) he deals with really cliche super heroes/villains in an epic struggle that sees him haymakering spandex clad poseurs GOOD AND BAD because NOBODY would believe him.

All that stands between them and the complete destruction of the Multiverse is an ugly scrawny guy with a 1980's model Ford and an admittedly really good jacket.

"Look, it's Conventional Man!"
"That's right kids- just remember. You're nobody in particular!"

Lebell
3rd May 09, 07:42 AM
Ah...i have fond memories of when i was in a league of heroes!

We patrolled the streets in our fancy brown uniforms and our black boots!
Keeping the world safe from communists and other unwanted elements such as democrats and gypsies!

Good times.

Spade: The Real Snake
3rd May 09, 10:34 AM
Conventional Man has NO super powers, works stuffing envelopes and lives in a one room flat.

At night (or on other obscure occasions) he deals with really cliche super heroes/villains in an epic struggle that sees him haymakering spandex clad poseurs GOOD AND BAD because NOBODY would believe him.

All that stands between them and the complete destruction of the Multiverse is an ugly scrawny guy with a 1980's model Ford and an admittedly really good jacket.

"Look, it's Conventional Man!"
"That's right kids- just remember. You're nobody in particular!"

Toby you will be known as the Crip-Keeper.
Archenemy to Able-Bodied Man

Doritosaurus Chex
3rd May 09, 12:05 PM
Toby you will be known as the Crip-Keeper.
Archenemy to Able-Bodied Man

http://www.hulu.com/watch/4992/in-living-color-handiman-joins-the-justice-legion

"Never underestimate the powers of the handicapped."

Arhetton
6th May 09, 07:25 AM
facepalm.

Steroids.

Plate mail.

Motorcycle leathers.

Knuckle dusters.

Maybe then he will be able to stop someone.

EuropIan
6th May 09, 08:21 AM
.....pfffffffft......
HAHAHAHAHAHA
Da1ADqPplQ4

Wait, there's more of these guys?!

OSxGhD3nIPE

JingMerchant!
6th May 09, 12:14 PM
And here is the website for the World SuperHero Registry.


Angle-Grinder Man = WIN!

http://www.worldsuperheroregistry.com/world_superhero_registry_gallery.htm So, ah... does this website have a forum...?

Anyone up for a visit...?

Adouglasmhor
6th May 09, 01:07 PM
Angle Grinder man is cool, he has unclamped loads of cars (it's private companies who clamp but it's legal in England and Wales but Illegal in Scotland).

I have a zentai suit with a skellington (it's more correcter) so that's the basis of my costume sorted out. so what will my supervillain name be?

http://img.villagephotos.com/p/2005-8/1070113/skellington.jpg

Harpy
6th May 09, 06:50 PM
Needlepoint? Dougie, your avatar really scares me :(

Arhetton
6th May 09, 08:26 PM
your name can be:

big-boned


lol

EuropIan
6th May 09, 08:29 PM
Angle Grinder man is cool, he has unclamped loads of cars (it's private companies who clamp but it's legal in England and Wales but Illegal in Scotland).

I have a zentai suit with a skellington (it's more correcter) so that's the basis of my costume sorted out. so what will my supervillain name be?

http://img.villagephotos.com/p/2005-8/1070113/skellington.jpg
We both know that's a Skullomania cosplay outfit

Harpy
6th May 09, 08:45 PM
your name can be:

big-boned


lol

You better not be talking to me. Oh my god, we could start a vigilante team in Sydney, you'd be Giraffe Boy!

Arhetton
6th May 09, 09:16 PM
lily I'm not self conscious about my body


http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/3313/loltco.png

and its almost unfair how I can eat whatever the hell I want and be unaffected by it. I should call myself metabolism man!

Toby Christensen
6th May 09, 09:43 PM
I too can eat what I like as long as I go for a really long walk.

I am getting a "Handi Man" style outfit done for special occasions. He doesn't speak like me and I have full use of my hands though.

Also, I'm not African American.

Toby Christensen
6th May 09, 09:53 PM
Also, the fighting "style" Handi Man uses shows he belongs to an awesome stagefighter's guild. He clearly knows shiyoukinshi very well.

(And a plus rep to first person who gets that without cheating).

mrm1775
7th May 09, 12:20 AM
lily I'm not self conscious about my body


http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/3313/loltco.png

and its almost unfair how I can eat whatever the hell I want and be unaffected by it. I should call myself metabolism man!I hate you and your entire mutant race.

Toby Christensen
7th May 09, 01:18 AM
Speaking on behalf of lean people:

Shut up before I metabolise you.

(Goes off to get bacon sanger)

Spade: The Real Snake
7th May 09, 10:10 AM
I too can eat what I like as long as I go for a really long walk.

I am getting a "Handi Man" style outfit done for special occasions. He doesn't speak like me and I have full use of my hands though.

Also, I'm not African American.

I have already dubbed you "The Crip-Keeper" and you cannot change your name.

Toby Christensen
7th May 09, 11:17 AM
The "Crip Keeper" wiil do. Our fighting "styles" are very similar (parries, trips, punches, kicks, headbutts, disallowing a downed opponent the chance to get up).

Adouglasmhor
7th May 09, 04:58 PM
Needlepoint? Dougie, your avatar really scares me :(

That really is me.

Harpy
7th May 09, 05:24 PM
I know that which is why I am freaking out!

Adouglasmhor
8th May 09, 02:59 PM
Sorry, if you want I will change it, otherwise it would be non consensual.

Ajamil
11th May 09, 04:17 AM
http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/bttf/images/thumb/3/35/Needles.JPG/250px-Needles.JPG
Needles?

Lebell
11th May 09, 06:07 AM
I want to be zero tolerance man, it would be hard to tell wether im a super hero or villain.
i'd save kittens from trees but also beat homeless people with bricks and mercilessly persecute junkies and basically everyone who doesnt fit in my view of what society should be made up like.

kracker
12th May 09, 09:02 AM
I want to be zero tolerance man, it would be hard to tell wether im a super hero or villain.
i'd save kittens from trees but also beat homeless people with bricks and mercilessly persecute junkies and basically everyone who doesnt fit in my view of what society should be made up like.

They already have people like that, they are called cops.

Toby Christensen
12th May 09, 11:51 AM
The Cripp'd Keeper approves of Zero Tolerance man's methods.

KO'd N DOA
12th May 09, 11:59 AM
The Cripp'd Keeper approves of Zero Tolerance man's methods.

Beware, Zero Tolerance man might not tolerate your posting habits, and bring out the brick....

Adouglasmhor
12th May 09, 02:50 PM
We both know that's a Skullomania cosplay outfit

I didn't but I do now.

mrm1775
13th May 09, 03:26 AM
They already have people like that, they are called cops.Hey kracker:
6PaHcZUHI00
Seriously, your like the broken-fucking-record of Sociocide.

kracker
14th May 09, 10:51 AM
I'd rather not

Toby Christensen
14th May 09, 12:35 PM
Kracker,

Lots of people have been brutalised by cops. I have, even.

I don't agree with the laws, or with the fact that ordinary police over here carry guns. I wrote my own dossier.

However, in light of the fact that it would both:
a) Present vigilante opportunities for me
b) Break down whatever passes for law and order

Shut up.

Spade: The Real Snake
14th May 09, 12:39 PM
^^
The Secret Origin Of The Crip-Keeper.

Brutalized By COPS!
BEATEN, BLOODIED, BRUISED, HOBBLED and LEFT FOR DEAD!!
Taken in by a kindly MuscleFemme who teaches him the dark arts of Carney Strongmen!
NOW WITH HIS WHEELCHAIR OF JUSTICE he rolls into the night, upholding justice of handicapped folk EVERYWHERE (except those who wish to have him attend a TD)...........
HE
IS
THE CRIP-KEEPER!

Doritosaurus Chex
14th May 09, 02:50 PM
Too bad everybody knows about The Crip-Keeper's kryptonite, or should I say Cripple-nite:

Life is cruel.
Nobody cares.
Especially for those
Whose weakness is

http://wiki.ytmnd.com/images/1/12/Profx.jpg

Spade: The Real Snake
14th May 09, 02:52 PM
No doubt that is the fiend "Able-Bodied Man" battling with our hero.

Toby Christensen
14th May 09, 05:14 PM
Yeah, but I WALK everywhere but having the Cripp'd Keeper fight using a sports wheelchair (by wielding it prowreslter style) would be awesome.

Lebell
15th May 09, 03:58 AM
Yeah, but I WALK everywhere but having the Cripp'd Keeper fight using a sports wheelchair (by wielding it prowreslter style) would be awesome.

no, think clark kent/ superman.

in daily life you are (sort off) normal, then when you get a distress call via your special helmet you limp off to a phoneboot, change into your cripkeeper outfit and fold out your wheelchair and roll towards glory!

all this while heavily drewling ofcourse.

Doritosaurus Chex
15th May 09, 07:50 AM
no, think clark kent/ superman.

in daily life you are (sort off) normal, then when you get a distress call via your special helmet you limp off to a phoneboot, change into your cripkeeper outfit and fold out your wheelchair and roll towards glory!

all this while heavily drewling ofcourse.

Imagine applying this to the Kill Bill Superman/Clark Kent monologue.

Shawarma
15th May 09, 11:47 AM
Who's the chap throwing Prof X down the stairs anyway? Looks like a cross between Chucks Norris and Bronson.

Ajamil
15th May 09, 05:28 PM
I believe that was the Ultimate's Mister Sinister. They really fucked with that character - made him some crazy hobo who had to kill mutants to bring about the coming of Apocalypse.