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WarPhalange
22nd November 08, 09:46 PM
It sucks. Jesus Christ. I'm a fan of Manowar and Iced Earth, which is kind of power metal. I thought "I really like the sound of Manowar. I want to find something similar, but less dragons and faeries."

What did I find? That's all there is in "power metal" these days. Oh sure, I knew Dragonforce sucked shit straight out of MJS's mouth, but I had no idea that literally all bands who claim to be power metal are that way. I know, I know. You're saying "Duh, the bands you listen to are American whereas nearly all other power metal is from Europe, of course it sucks!", but that doesn't work. There is lots of good music, including metal, from Europe. For example, all music that came from Britain originally came from Europe. So that theory doesn't work.

Anyway, take a listen to some of the shit being churned out today:

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And here's a full Dragonforce song:

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Contrast that with Manowar (acoustic intro, skip to 1:20):

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No, those aren't production effects my friends, he actually sings that low. Know what that's called? "Normal for a man". Compare that to the previous clips, where all the male singers sounded like they just got kicked in the balls. Where's the power in that? This song makes me want to go out, hail (whatever that means), and kill shit. Whereas the previous clips make me want to go to my sister's room and play patty-cake with her while watching Yu-Gi-Oh.

Also, did you notice that you could actually discern the notes that the guitarist was playing? Know what that's called? "Not being shit". Making your guitar sound like it's having a seizure is not skill if that's all you can do.

Here's a clip of Iced Earth as another example:

6LrGSIYAn9c

Normal vocals, guitars that aren't on PCP and cocaine, and most importantly it sounds different than Manowar. Bands that sound different from each other, what a concept!





Okay, now let's compare these bands pictographologically. I will put these in spoiler tags because hey, I'm a pretty cool guy.

Manowar up first. Yeah, so they look like they are about to film some weird fetish gay porno. But a lot of you do BJJ or Judo, so shut the fuck up. Notice how they lack the parasite known as a "gut" and a few of them even have these things called "muscles", although still in their developing stages.



http://everseradio.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/manowar1.jpg

Let's contrast this to Dragonforce.

http://www.dragonforce.com/images/uploads/band/band_bio_header_610.jpg

Ghey? You be the judge.

Nightwish:

http://rockblogazzurro.files.wordpress.com/2007/11/nightwish.jpg


Two (three if you count the chick) pirates and a guy who has his beard in pigtails. Yeah, that's epic right there. I can totally see these people slaying dragons and riding on wings of dreams or whatever they sing about.


Lastly, let's take a look at some of these fans.

http://i237.photobucket.com/albums/ff138/andres_lozano/Funny%20Stuff/heavymetal.jpg

Guess what bands those are?


In conclusion, I'm really pissed that I found this entire area of metal that just completely sucks. I have to add it to the list that so far only contained hair metal, nu metal, and a lot (but not all) of black metal.

Oh, and ALL of this new shit is on that list, too.

chiVMrWMHko

Razamataz
22nd November 08, 10:09 PM
Ah, a Sociocide thread I'm interested in. In my day, we called that ultra fast guitar playing and all the singers that try and sound like Getty Lee Progressive Rock. I don't know when it turned into 'Power Metal' (whatever the hell that is), but I do find the gheyness of it disturbing.

I get sick of that shit really fast when every song features pinch harmonics (I think that's what it's called, don't play guitar) and double kick drums all the damn time!

WarPhalange
22nd November 08, 10:11 PM
Geddy Lee. Jesus Christ.

Razamataz
22nd November 08, 10:26 PM
Rush was before my time and I don't listen it. Neal Peart greatest drummer my ass.

WarPhalange
22nd November 08, 10:29 PM
How many drummers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Ten. 1 one to put it in and 9 to comment on how Neil Peart would have done it better.

Razamataz
22nd November 08, 10:31 PM
I've actually heard that joke (or a similar one) before.

WarPhalange
22nd November 08, 10:41 PM
Fuck you.

Tanhalen21
22nd November 08, 11:03 PM
How many drummers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Ten. 1 one to put it in and 9 to comment on how Neil Peart would have done it better.
This is an awesome joke.

Buddy Rich would upstage Neil Peart using only his cock

WarPhalange
23rd November 08, 02:05 AM
Okay, I almost found something I liked while looking for videos of bass playing:

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The guy's fucking insane, even if he is just following the guitars. Anyway, the song is pretty decent until it gets to the chorus. The chorus totally fags up the entire song. Instantly brings images of Yu-Gi-Oh and Pokemon to my head. I don't want that when I am trying to get pumped up to lift something over my head. It won't help.

Arhetton
23rd November 08, 02:13 AM
lyrics from one of the songs:

'may your swords be wet, like a virgin in her prime, hold your hammers hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh'

what is this dumb shit.

Arhetton
23rd November 08, 02:26 AM
HrYlFE9aO3o

Arhetton
23rd November 08, 02:34 AM
hahaha even cracked managed to make funney out of dragonforce:

http://www.cracked.com/article_15123_five-most-unintentionally-funny-albums-2006.html

http://cdn-i.dmdentertainment.com/cracked/img/articles/bands/chart.jpg

WarPhalange
23rd November 08, 02:34 AM
lyrics from one of the songs:

'may your swords be wet, like a virgin in her prime, hold your hammers hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh'

what is this dumb shit.

It is concentrated awesome. It's like watching Conan The Barbarian in 6 minutes or so.

Tanhalen21
23rd November 08, 02:38 AM
Poops do you have long, curly hair and wear a gauntlet?

Or do you look more like this

http://media.comicvine.com/uploads/0/2/75604-42606-alan-moore_large.jpg

WarPhalange
23rd November 08, 02:50 AM
Nah, my hair is fairly straight. And I tried a beard (re: too lazy to shave) for a while and it didn't work. Made me look like white trash and was itchy.

Also, no accessories. Those are a waste of time. Although I have a friend who wears those metal finger things.

MEGALEF
23rd November 08, 06:20 AM
I went to Wacken Open Air in Germany this summer. Now I don't look particularly metal myself. I only own a single band t-shirt and generally don't care so much about the whole lifestyle thing.

A bunch of things at the festival got my head all confused. I was overwhelmed by the insane amounts of merchandise at sale everywhere. Not just your common band t-shirts but toasters, socks, underwear, playing cards, fucking baby pyjamas all with W:O:A or band logos.

The uniformity with which everyone was dressed got to me as well. The first time I saw one of them drinking horns I thought "Wow, that's mighty cool having a cows horn to drink out of. He must have put some work into that" but then I noticed how they were made out of plastic and on sale for 7-9.

Underground music my ass. Metal is commercialised as hell and record labels looking to make a buck are signing whatever bands they can get their hands on, the majority of which is utter crap. People who like to think they're breaking off from the herd are really just joining another one.

I listen to different music different reasons. Some bands like Manowar and Dream Evil I listen to simply because they are so over the top it's bordering to comedy. Still, many of these bands still have some musical value. I have no idea if there are any Power Metal bands that are worth listening to nowadays but once in a while one comes across a decent song.
NGbNhmrlN-c

UM80xp6vNbk

MEGALEF
23rd November 08, 06:21 AM
hahaha even cracked managed to make funney out of dragonforce:

http://www.cracked.com/article_15123_five-most-unintentionally-funny-albums-2006.html

http://cdn-i.dmdentertainment.com/cracked/img/articles/bands/chart.jpg
'Battle' was mentioned only three times??

Fuzzy
23rd November 08, 09:24 AM
Amon Amarth: because they at least sound like men.

Craigypooh
23rd November 08, 10:26 AM
Search no more: there are 15 AC/DC albums, 9 Led Zeppelin albums and 18 Deep Purple albums. How much more metal does anyone need?

Kiko
23rd November 08, 11:21 AM
http://www.thegelatinouscube.com/comics/2008-08-15-one-possible.jpg

WarPhalange
23rd November 08, 01:38 PM
Search no more: there are 15 AC/DC albums, 9 Led Zeppelin albums and 18 Deep Purple albums. How much more metal does anyone need?

None of those are metal, sorry. DP and maybe even Zeppelin can be classified as "proto-metal", but the first real metal band was Sabbath. Listen to Sabbath vs DP or LZ and you'll know why metal is its own genre.

For one, the lyrical themes. Metal isn't about love, unless maybe it's some kind of lost love via violent means or insanity. Like Conan losing Valeria. You could sing about that. Or something like NIB by Sabbath. That had a good twist to it.

Secondly, the overall sound of the song. Is it in a major key? It's not metal*. Does it sound happy? It's not metal.

That's not to say those bands are bad, just they are in a different genre. I have a few LZ albums I listen to. But they're not metal.


*Okay, so Number of the Beast was written in a major key, but they managed to pull it off via awesome lyrics.

WarPhalange
23rd November 08, 02:04 PM
Underground music my ass. Metal is commercialised as hell and record labels looking to make a buck are signing whatever bands they can get their hands on, the majority of which is utter crap. People who like to think they're breaking off from the herd are really just joining another one.

For sure. It reminds me of those "You laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at you because you're all the same." t-shirts that are mass produced.

Almost all new death metal bands sound exactly the same. Cannibal Corpse and other bands of that era pretty much reached the limit of how brutal and gory you can get, how muddy and fast your playing can be and still count as music. But it doesn't stop these new guys from doing the same thing over and over again.

Power metal went the same way apparently, even though I would have thought there was more creative freedom there because you're not limited to your songs having to sound dark and evil and playing down-tuned guitars.

That's why I pretty much limit myself from bands before 2000. I haven't been able to find a newer band that I've been able to stick to. I'll get an album, kind of like it, but then realize all the songs sound exactly the same, so that's that. It was inevitable, though. There is no genre of counterculture music that hasn't be totally raped and murdered by record companies looking to make a buck.


I listen to different music different reasons. Some bands like Manowar and Dream Evil I listen to simply because they are so over the top it's bordering to comedy.

I know, it's awesome. Exactly what I need to get me pumped up is to get in a frenzy of "Fight for metal" and "kill the enemy" songs.


Still, many of these bands still have some musical value. I have no idea if there are any Power Metal bands that are worth listening to nowadays but once in a while one comes across a decent song.
NGbNhmrlN-c

UM80xp6vNbk

Wow, how 80's sounding. I just got this flashback of G.I. Joe and Thundercats and Transformers for some reason. But I'll take it over this new stuff.

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
23rd November 08, 03:58 PM
if you're looking for where all the good musicians went it's instrumental hip hop

WarPhalange
23rd November 08, 05:00 PM
Not jazz? Wha happen?

http://www.cynical-c.com/archives/bloggraphics/Bush%20confused%2021_a.jpg


Got tired of that gimmick? Or is instrumental hip hop even more obscure or something?

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
23rd November 08, 05:00 PM
No, I just really really like Ratatat right now.

WarPhalange
23rd November 08, 05:22 PM
Good for you. But this is a thread about power metal. So either say it's shit, or try to defend it somehow.

Actually, I found that Therion isn't too bad, but I guess they're not power metal, per se. Still, I'll take what I can get.

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Oh, and don't look at the fucking anime bullshit. I HATE it when people do that shit.

Dark Helmet
23rd November 08, 10:21 PM
Nightwish is good.However Nightwish is even better with nuke's going off.

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MEGALEF
24th November 08, 03:21 AM
For sure. It reminds me of those "You laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at you because you're all the same." t-shirts that are mass produced.
Haha. You're right. I spotted a couple of guys at the festival wearing shirts with similar texts. At that moment they were surrounded by ~70 000 dudes with the same hairstyle wearing nearly the exact same clothes. Irony.

Therion has some good songs. You should definitely check the Secret of The Runes album. It is filled with bombastic (not sure if I'm using that word right) borderline comedy. The band members themselves seem pretty messed up though. Helheim from aforementioned above has it's melody ripped straight from some old SS march. Also, this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dragon_Rouge Wtf.

WarPhalange
24th November 08, 11:53 AM
Yeah, I looked at some more Therion and they started out as bread and butter death metal in '87 and somehow transitioned into this full on fucking opera sound with like 5 vocalists. Very weird transition.

WarPhalange
24th November 08, 12:18 PM
Haha. You're right. I spotted a couple of guys at the festival wearing shirts with similar texts. At that moment they were surrounded by ~70 000 dudes with the same hairstyle wearing nearly the exact same clothes. Irony.

Therion has some good songs. You should definitely check the Secret of The Runes album. It is filled with bombastic (not sure if I'm using that word right) borderline comedy. The band members themselves seem pretty messed up though. Helheim from aforementioned above has it's melody ripped straight from some old SS march. Also, this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dragon_Rouge Wtf.

Yes, these people are batshit insane. Yeah, I have long hair, wear jeans and sometimes a band t-shirt. Wearing a Slayer one right now. But I don't pretend to be some sort of counter-culture outcast of society. None of my friends really listen to metal. They don't care that I do and I don't care that they don't. None of my professors care that I dress this way or that I have long hair. Nobody gives a shit about my "image" and I'm not making any sort of statement by wearing what I wear.

Oddly enough I started growing my hair out before I started listening to metal, and still only ever wore jeans or khakis and a t-shirt.

If there's one thing I hate is being different for the sake of being different. It shows that the person is insecure.

Truculent Sheep
24th November 08, 02:58 PM
Oddly enough I started growing my hair out before I started listening to metal, and still only ever wore jeans or khakis and a t-shirt.

If there's one thing I hate is being different for the sake of being different. It shows that the person is insecure.

Don't get me started on the wanton faggotry of the UK metal scene. Inbred, petty, bitchy, shockingly conformist... Did I also mention it's a white middle class ghetto for pissheads who use it as an excuse to treat women like pliant holes to stick their cocks into?

Anyway, some Blind Guardian:

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Some Iced Earth:

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And some Nevermore:

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TheMightyMcClaw
24th November 08, 06:49 PM
Let me clarify this from the beginning: I love power metal. It brings endless light and joy into my life. I was first introduced to it through Hammerfall, Metalium, and Rhapsody when I was a freshmen in high school, and it has formed a pillar of my very existence since then.
I don't really enjoy DragonForce or Nightwish all that much, though DragonForce is a blast live. They're very different in concert.
I'd like to recommend two bands to you, who happen to be amongst my very favorite groups who start with the letter "V": Virgin Steele and Van Canto.
Virgin Steele is American power metal, much in the same tradition of Manowar, except occasionally they write new material and their music actually varies from decade to decade. Not that I mind that about Manowar, mind you - I enjoy their consistency throughout the years. They're like a control variable for metal.
Anyways, Virgin Steele:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C7whL2TCFaE
They're older stuff (pre-Invictus) doesn't do much for me, but Invictus and Visions of Eden are right up there with my favorite albums of all time.
Secondly, Van Canto, the mostly-a capella power metal band. Five vocalists, one drummer, all awesome.
Take the Skies:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g078fbeWB-c
Also, their cover of Kings of Metal:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TH3LghdBWxc

Finally, how familiar are you with viking metal? If you're just looking for awesome Conan the Barbarian-sounding music about wrecking shit up, you should look into Ensiferum and their ilk.

Naszir
24th November 08, 07:44 PM
You want metal that isn't this fey nonsense? It isn't Maiden or Manowar but it does have some badasserie to it.

Viking Skull
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Down
kb2fbm9u7e0

Less power metal and more doom or sludge

Electric Wizard
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Witchcraft
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Or you could just go back and listen to old Saxon and Maiden songs and enjoy it.

TheMightyMcClaw
25th November 08, 05:28 PM
To continue in the Manowar-theme of Awesome Metal about Wrecking Shit up, I would like to give you some of the other bands who make up the majority of my "NO MERCY" playlist.
Ensiferum, from Finnland:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1s6Fz8BATWE
I saw these guys live in concert in Detroit (along with Turisas, Tyr, and Eluveitie). They were awesome. I was deeply impressed when the band took the stage, all wearing Finnish flags as kilts.
In fact, you might also enjoy Eluveitie, from Switzerland:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=coTd0UoFyXY
Pay careful attention to the lyrics. Notice that it's not English. Or French. Or German. Or any other language that's been spoken in the past 1000 years. In addition to singing in Gaulish, their band also contains a bagpiper and a hurdy-gurdyist.
Sabaton, from Sweden:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11t9_h1uo0w
Sabaton has traded in the usual power metal themes of swords and horses for an obsession with World War II, tanks, and fire bombing. They take the term "jingoistic" to whole new levels.

Sun Wukong
25th November 08, 06:30 PM
if you're looking for where all the good musicians went it's instrumental hip hop

... dear god, you've finally gone insane.

It's OK kid, I know what to do in times like these.


0GDJXDGhae8

MEGALEF
26th November 08, 08:49 AM
post
That was some impressive fail you displayed there. Linkwise I mean.

Truculent Sheep
26th November 08, 02:08 PM
'You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Sun Wukong again.'

TheMightyMcClaw
30th November 08, 09:31 PM
That was some impressive fail you displayed there. Linkwise I mean.
Damn, how the hell did I even do that? I mean, aside from the obvious of hitting ctr+v twice. Three times in a row.