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View Full Version : Want to order a pizza? F*ck you.



WarPhalange
1st June 08, 06:07 PM
Holy Jesus. I tried ordering a pizza from Dominos just now. I haven't had to order a pizza in ages. I either get it at school which I only get like a slice or two, or for SPS lunches which someone else orders, or if my parents get one, it's because they didn't feel like cooking and were already at the store.

So anyway, I call up Dominos. Get the machine. "A fucking machine?" I think. It was great, he even had a little fabricated uncertainty in his pre-recorded voice.

So anyway, we go through the address, how many pizzas and what size. Then we get to the topings. What the fuck? I order "everything on it", how the fuck do I know what that shit is called? I see meat and I see veggies. At that point I hang up.

Not only do they charge you up the ass for pizza, but now it's more work to order one than to cook fucking dinner?

Cullion
1st June 08, 06:09 PM
Fuck capitalism. You need socialised pizza delivery.

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
1st June 08, 06:13 PM
Dominoes is pretty mid-tier when it comes to pizza. I remember Papa Johns being about the best of the franchises, though I haven't eaten there in years. Little Caesars is worst but oh god their crazy bread is good. The best pizza usually comes from local mom and pop operations or regional chains - sort of like how In-n-Out is the best burger joint but is almost entirely based in California.

WarPhalange
1st June 08, 06:18 PM
Agreed. I get Pagliacci's Pizza when on campus.

http://www.pagliacci.com/index.shtml

But they're an hour away. The stuff my parents get is from a local WinCo. I'd go there, but fuck I haven't been there in like 2 years so I don't even remember where it is anymore.

I had to go with Pizza Hut. Domino's didn't want my service and I eat enough Papa Johns at those SPS lunches.



Fuck capitalism. You need socialised pizza delivery.

Capitalism is great until everybody decides to use the same business model. Then you get shitty pizza chains and they all cost the same. Oops.

jvjim
1st June 08, 06:18 PM
order online, better service with bigger discounts @ dominospizza.com

Oh yeah Little Ceasar's $5 pizzas kept me alive through college.

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
1st June 08, 06:19 PM
this thread is now about In-N-Out.

Want In-N-Out? No problem our customer service is fantastic.

jvjim
1st June 08, 06:20 PM
Dreamland BBQ>gay California McCrapburger's

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
1st June 08, 06:22 PM
It's okay, I'd be pretty bitter about not having In-N-Out too.

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
1st June 08, 06:22 PM
this thread is now about how bad southern food is, specifically grits

Cullion
1st June 08, 06:24 PM
Dominos in the UK is pretty much the nastiest, bottom of the range pizza takeaway. Express Pizza Company or Ask are much better quality, but you have to go and collect.

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
1st June 08, 06:27 PM
a place nearby serves breaded alligator bits. like, alligator nuggets. they're pretty good, but i want to find a place that will give me an alligator steak.

Cullion
1st June 08, 06:31 PM
This is the best burger chain in the UK:-

http://www.gbkinfo.com/GBK_Menu.htm

Their specials menu has burgers made out of wild boar meat and stuff.

But it's so expensive I'd usually rather just get some thai curry for the same price.

jvjim
1st June 08, 06:36 PM
Grits fucking rules, so does gator. You know what, I may go to the local seafood restaurant and have potatoes and gravy, fried shrimp, grits and alligator all during one meal, using all local ingredients, for low, low prices. Suck it.

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
1st June 08, 06:36 PM
come to california and have an in-n-out burger and some of the hat's pastrami

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
1st June 08, 06:37 PM
you voted for george bush too

jvjim
1st June 08, 06:41 PM
The last time I went to Calafornee it wasn't so bad. I didn't feel guilty about seeing impoverished black people and Universal Studios was pretty cool.

WarPhalange
1st June 08, 08:14 PM
So... Bush's cock tastes good you're saying?

WarPhalange
1st June 08, 08:30 PM
You're making this too easy.

kungfujew
1st June 08, 09:34 PM
Dreamland BBQ>gay California McCrapburger's

That's gay California Fundamentalist Christian McCrapburger, buddy.

Dark Helmet
1st June 08, 10:20 PM
Want In-N-Out? Somehow when a 16 year old boy says these words...............

SFGOON
1st June 08, 10:49 PM
I know! I'm turned on too!

Dark Helmet
1st June 08, 10:57 PM
He's mine you fucking whore!

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
1st June 08, 11:33 PM
you could spitroast me

nihilist
2nd June 08, 12:37 AM
Fuck capitalism. You need socialised pizza delivery.

In Russia, PIZZA ORDERS YOU!

nihilist
2nd June 08, 01:43 AM
I thought that was called ping pong.

Stick
2nd June 08, 01:48 AM
http://i25.tinypic.com/2rhsq9s.jpg

Superior.

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
2nd June 08, 01:48 AM
What's a matter? Too blind to enjoy pickles?

Stick
2nd June 08, 01:50 AM
What's a matter? Sand in your vagina?

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
2nd June 08, 01:51 AM
The joke's on you! I have a penis!

nihilist
2nd June 08, 01:52 AM
So, you have penis in your vagina then?

Stick
2nd June 08, 01:53 AM
What a slut.

nihilist
2nd June 08, 01:55 AM
Bet heshe doesn't even wear a condom.

socratic
2nd June 08, 02:19 AM
Eat your pickles, they're good for you. And makes sure you get extra salt on those fries, bromide.








I'm sorry, I just can't do it. That burger will kill you. Go eat something healthy.

Alternatively, you know it's good because it'll kill you.

Neildo
2nd June 08, 02:24 AM
fuck i'm hungry now. you all suck.

Steve
2nd June 08, 02:25 AM
A MJS spitroast made you hungry?

Neildo
2nd June 08, 02:28 AM
http://www.courtfarm.org/images/hog_spit_roast_hire1.JPG

hell yes?

Steve
2nd June 08, 02:33 AM
Well, it does sorta look like him.

Sirc
2nd June 08, 05:38 AM
Don't eat from pizza hut.

You've been warned.

EvilSteve
2nd June 08, 10:16 AM
Domino's sux. Dunno where Loops is, but surely you Detroit folks must have better local joints than some bland-ass national chain?

WarPhalange
2nd June 08, 12:04 PM
http://www.courtfarm.org/images/hog_spit_roast_hire1.JPG

hell yes?

That looks very painful. And delicious.

nihilist
2nd June 08, 04:46 PM
It only hurts the first time.

Cullion
2nd June 08, 04:52 PM
Because your first time, will be your last time. Oh yes it will.

nihilist
2nd June 08, 04:55 PM
Oh yes, there will be barbecue sauce.

Tanhalen21
2nd June 08, 05:19 PM
I want pizza so bad now. Too bad I live in the bumfuck mountains where there is no such thing as even remotely ethnic food

nihilist
2nd June 08, 05:28 PM
Ethnic?
It's tomato sauce and cheese on bread.

Zendetta
2nd June 08, 06:58 PM
this thread is now about In-N-Out.

Want In-N-Out? No problem our customer service is fantastic.

God, I LOVE In-N-Out. Awesome non-corporate entreprenuerism - I feel proud to be an American every time I'm there.

Double-Double animal-style, yo!

And yes, their customer service is solid. If you compare it to something like MacDonalds, their customer service is like Mother Theresa Does Calcutta.


this thread is now about how bad southern food is, specifically grits

Oh. Well, Fuck You, Yankee.

You just never had grits with freshly hunted dove breasts and homemade dove gravy with biscuits.

In the words of My Paw.... "Boy, you just don' know whats good."

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
2nd June 08, 07:02 PM
Look, I don't care what they're with. Just because I'll eat everything else on the plate doesn't mean I'll eat those nasty ass grits. And yes, I've had authentic down home grits. Still nasty as shit.

Tanhalen21
2nd June 08, 07:37 PM
Ethnic?
It's tomato sauce and cheese on bread.

That's why I qualified it with "even remotely"

MEGA JESUS-SAMA
2nd June 08, 08:55 PM
fucking italians taking our jobs

Tanhalen21
2nd June 08, 09:00 PM
Fucking Italians speaking so loudly in my ear

WarPhalange
2nd June 08, 09:28 PM
fucking italians taking our jobs

Don't forget the Irish.

Robot Jesus
31st August 08, 01:52 PM
don't fancy a bit of the old in and out; got a pain in the gulliver?

Robot Jesus
31st August 08, 02:00 PM
also burger inn owns all

WarPhalange
31st August 08, 03:03 PM
Also, you're a thread necroing idiot.

Robot Jesus
31st August 08, 04:14 PM
it was on the front page, new subform necrod it before i got to it.

Kiko
31st August 08, 04:22 PM
Pizza would be really nice about now.. Just got home from the Ren Faire... had about 4 ales or maybe 3 and a hard cider..

Can't cook.... thank God one of the kids will make some killer
http://www.annies.com/uploads/479faabb57b19.jpg
with dill and tuna.. mmmmm

But why can't you find local pizza? Gotta be better than chain crap! Don't you EVER complain about ham sandwiches again when you order from those places!!

Steve
31st August 08, 08:20 PM
Pizza would be really nice about now.. Just got home from the Ren Faire... had about 4 ales or maybe 3 and a hard cider..

Kiko, it's time I told you that I love you.

polishillusion
1st September 08, 03:09 PM
Man, Polish food is the best.

Stick
1st September 08, 03:12 PM
I just ordered a large pepperoni, 2 liter of pepsi, and 7 spicy wings from Manny & Olga's. It comes to $20, I should get 3-4 meals out of it.

nihilist
1st September 08, 03:12 PM
Man, Polish food is the best.

Cabbage and stew.

Sounds exhilarating.

Cullion
1st September 08, 03:30 PM
Actually the version of it I've had in the Polish restaurant in Oxford is pretty good.

nihilist
1st September 08, 03:40 PM
"Jedzcie, pijcie i popuszczajcie pasa"

Kiko
1st September 08, 04:30 PM
I love you too, Steve.

But today I had to work so I kinda passed out last night.... After a full day of "my son wants a reptile.... " "how many fish can I put in a tank this big?"
I come home to chicken thighs, italian sweet sausages, peppers and homegrown tomatoes slow roasted on a smoker...

I'll fax you some!

partyboy
1st September 08, 04:50 PM
Cabbage and stew.

Sounds exhilarating.

pierogis ftw!

Kiko
1st September 08, 05:06 PM
Pierogi, gołąbki, pączki…..

WarPhalange
1st September 08, 05:17 PM
Oh fuck, I LOVE pączki. My mom found a recipe for them online and started making them a few months back. Still not 100% for some reason, she thinks it could be because the flour here in the USA sucks ass just like all the other food, but still, they're awesome.

http://images-cdn01.associatedcontent.com/image/A2129/212935/300_212935.jpg

Jagodzianki, too, but those require blueberries, and again the American blueberries are crap because they are too big and wattery. Although great for eating raw, they suck for cooking because all the water just escapes and ruins everything. Note that despite the similar look, jagodzianki and pączki are made differently and taste differently.

http://img307.imageshack.us/img307/473/01jagodzianki2xh.jpg

Paszteciki are always good, too. They are more similar to pączki, but they have ground meat in them with some other stuff like some ground up onions and mushrooms. God these are always good for a snack, too. Also the bread part isn't sweet at all.

Can't find a good picture of these. Google doesn't have anything that resembles these on Image Search, which makes me very surprised.

Zrazy are another favorite of mine, although those aren't purely Polish.

Bigos, of course, is made of Win and Awesome. It's like curry, where the longer you cook it the better it tastes:

http://bp3.blogger.com/_Vodj9_lVzRI/R1GW_OXYw6I/AAAAAAAABFA/yfWBJwu-7dg/s400/bigos_Spooky.jpg

Kiko
1st September 08, 05:26 PM
I've always meant to try making Bigos...it sounds yummy.

The pączki my grandmother made weren't traditional. They were probably closer to little beignets without filling and sprinked with regular sugar.

She did make the other stuff from scratch especially at Christmas and Easter. And told us about how her mother made something called Czernina. But you wanted pizza, didn't you?

WarPhalange
1st September 08, 05:31 PM
Czernina? Isn't that like blood soup?

Kiko
1st September 08, 05:37 PM
Yep. Duck's Blood Soup. Sounds nasty, doesn't it?

WarPhalange
1st September 08, 05:40 PM
Yup. Fucking Pollacks.

Kiko
1st September 08, 05:43 PM
Let's get a pizza!

partyboy
1st September 08, 05:50 PM
pierogis!

Kiko
1st September 08, 05:51 PM
Oh fine.... you bring the sour cream, I'll fry up some onions!

WarPhalange
1st September 08, 06:00 PM
Eww sour cream. My mom makes a few varieties of pierogi. One is blueberries and sour cream, with some surgar, too, another is cabbage and mushrooms, usually with some bacon on them, and then some weird Russian ones with cheese and shit. I only like the middle ones.

nihilist
1st September 08, 07:23 PM
Is Pollack a race or religion?

I want to know what am insulting when berating their mentality.

WarPhalange
1st September 08, 07:34 PM
I want to know what am insulting when berating their mentality.

I don't think you're in any position to do that, what with you being a moron and all.

nihilist
1st September 08, 08:14 PM
Your insults are very stagnant at the moment, sadly.

Please read up on how to do it properly.

I would be happy to help you for a nominal charge.

WarPhalange
1st September 08, 08:19 PM
Your insults are very stagnant at the moment, sadly.

Please read up on how to do it properly.

I would be happy to help you for a nominal charge.

No thanks, my friend hooked me up with this 3rd grader that has the best "your mom" jokes in the entire playground.

When I need someone to teach me how to act like a shit head, though, I'll be sure to talk to you first.

nihilist
1st September 08, 08:20 PM
Actually SFGOON said I should be nice to you so that's out.

WarPhalange
1st September 08, 08:21 PM
GOON needs to take me on as his apprentice before he gets assassinated by the government.

nihilist
1st September 08, 08:25 PM
Episode 1:


SFGOON: "you're FIRED!"

Dark Helmet
1st September 08, 09:10 PM
GOON needs to take me on as his apprentice before he gets assassinated by the government.
If his little prank that he has planned doesn't pan-out of course.Until then.

BTW is that thread still in the mod section.

WarPhalange
1st September 08, 11:10 PM
It should be.

Steve
2nd September 08, 02:30 AM
I love you too, Steve.

But today I had to work so I kinda passed out last night.... After a full day of "my son wants a reptile.... " "how many fish can I put in a tank this big?"
I come home to chicken thighs, italian sweet sausages, peppers and homegrown tomatoes slow roasted on a smoker...

I'll fax you some!

*drool*

PM me for my fax number!

Kiko
2nd September 08, 11:23 AM
Only a dumb pollack would stick food in a fax machine! ;P

PL, why would Russians put shit in their pierogis? I mostly like the potato/onion/cheese ones. My dad likes the ones with prunes.. something called Lechvar? Ugh. I make them for him rarely at holidays. And sour cream is just.. NEEDED! Maybe it's something Poles in Pennsylvania do. I remember having sliced cucumbers with sour cream and tons of dill.

Poles are a nationality, btw. Most of the reason the jokes evolved is the same as Italians and Irish. What do they have in common? Most of the ones immigrating to the US back then were Catholic, unlike the previous wave that had settled before them.

Don't make me smack you with a smoked kiełbasa, Reese!

WarPhalange
2nd September 08, 12:21 PM
Only a dumb pollack would stick food in a fax machine! ;P

PL, why would Russians put shit in their pierogis? I mostly like the potato/onion/cheese ones. My dad likes the ones with prunes.. something called Lechvar?

Because Russians during WW2 were poor and they needed a way to eat or something I don't know. Never heard of Lechvar, though.


And sour cream is just.. NEEDED! Maybe it's something Poles in Pennsylvania do. I remember having sliced cucumbers with sour cream and tons of dill.


Don't make me smack you with a smoked kiełbasa, Reese!

Kiko, I hope to GOD you have a good meat store in your area with some decent kiełbasa. We're lucky to have a Polish store nearby that gets fresh meat every Friday. REAL kiełbasa is so much better than that crappy Safeway garbage.

Kiko
2nd September 08, 12:24 PM
Actually, we have a couple of options. When we're ambitious (and my brother is around) we do make kiełbasa from scratch. It never turns out quite like when my grandmother was around though. I prefer fresh to smoked, but both are nice.

Then we also have a pretty solid Polish community in a town nearby called Mahopac. There's a really neat deli where they make homemade kiełbasa, pierogi and other stuff. I know Mahopac isn't Polish, it's a Native American name, like lots of places around here...

nihilist
2nd September 08, 02:09 PM
Don't make me smack you with a smoked kielbasa, Reese!

Don't make me employ the dreaded naked ass defense.

Kiko
2nd September 08, 03:00 PM
I don't want to know how you make pizza...

nihilist
2nd September 08, 09:17 PM
Want I should tell you how a Pollack tosses a salad?

partyboy
2nd September 08, 10:36 PM
i just ate pizza

nihilist
2nd September 08, 10:51 PM
Does Pizza's dad know about this?

Neildo
3rd September 08, 01:33 AM
Only a dumb pollack would stick food in a fax machine! ;P

PL, why would Russians put shit in their pierogis? I mostly like the potato/onion/cheese ones. My dad likes the ones with prunes.. something called Lechvar? Ugh. I make them for him rarely at holidays. And sour cream is just.. NEEDED! Maybe it's something Poles in Pennsylvania do. I remember having sliced cucumbers with sour cream and tons of dill.

I like to fry mine in a little olive oil and throw in a bunch of very finely minced garlic in there at the last minute so it just gets a bit browned. serve with sour cream. c'est fantastique! sauteed onions with maybe bacon bits or some ground beef with melted cheese and salsa. and sour cream. basically perogies without sour cream are unacceptable.

Kiko
3rd September 08, 06:17 AM
Never tried olive oil. Butter/margarine and LOTS of chopped/sliced onions. Garlic is nice too, and I've lately added dill.

Yes, I confess that I usually use frozen pierogis.

I can imagine the answer, Reese. I think I've heard 'em all.

Hey, what if we made pierogi pizza?

nihilist
3rd September 08, 08:20 AM
With a hairy palm.

Robot Jesus
3rd September 08, 10:48 PM
as a fellow Slav, i am embarrassed to admit i don't know how to make pirogies. i was going to look it up for first contact day but i never got around to it.

Kiko
4th September 08, 06:24 AM
They're pretty simple. Dough is 1 egg/1 cup flour, make as much as you need. Do the volcano method.. Pile the flour on a board, beat the eggs and pour them into an indentation in the top of the pile (picture a volcano) gently work the flour into the egg until you have dough! Wrap it and refrigerate if you need to make fillings unless you've already done that. The filling needs to be cool, so if you're using potato, boil 'em, mash 'em, season and put 'em to the side. Do a quick google for different fillings.

Roll out the dough, make circles with a large glass/mug. Put a small bit of filling into the center and pinch the dough on the edges with a bit of water or beaten egg, crimp with a fork if you like, but don't poke any holes and try not to make little balloons - filling, no air.

In a large pot of boiling water, cook the pierogis as you would fresh ravioli - until they float. Then you can saute them with onions or if you want to waste all that effort put them in something like tomato sauce or who knows what.

Robot Jesus
4th September 08, 05:48 PM
excellent, next years celebrations will be more accurate.

Kiko
5th September 08, 04:14 PM
PM me if you want some more recipes... ;)

Robot Jesus
5th September 08, 06:59 PM
got anything that could be mistaken for
klingon food (ridiculusly hearty and rich; as well as weird looking)

WarPhalange
5th September 08, 08:17 PM
Bigos?

Robot Jesus
5th September 08, 09:02 PM
it does look like dead gagh

Kiko
6th September 08, 08:41 AM
Try the Duck's Blood Soup....

WarPhalange
6th September 08, 04:31 PM
My mom just received some Chinese herbs and spices in a mix.


From Poland. I'm eagerly awaiting the concoction she makes with it. Last time my brother went to Poland he had to bring his own hot sauce because everything there is for pansies.