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View Full Version : You can't make this up; Fox News Thinks Uwe Boll is a Genius



Stick
28th May 08, 12:15 AM
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LoL, marketing for postal

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socratic
28th May 08, 06:57 AM
I think they really just don't get that Uwe is a shitty director. Not, you know, a 'clever because he's self deprecating' director. Just a really, really bad filmmaker, who really doesn't get the point of the film industry. Or videogames.

That, or the greatest source of wasted money and troll the world has ever seen.

TheMightyMcClaw
28th May 08, 08:27 AM
Of course Uwe Boll is a great director.
Did you SEE In the Name of the King? That movie was pure genius!
Jason Statham as a fantasy hero. Burt Reynolds as the King. A farmer named Farmer. The guy who played Shaggy in the live action scooby doo movies. And finally proving once and for all, no force of evil can withstand a peasant with a machete and a boomerang.
This new film will no doubt be just as spectacular.

Dagon Akujin
28th May 08, 09:37 AM
In case you've never watched "Red Eye", it's humor is built on murdering gays, hating Muslims, and wishing for sexual escapades with underage hookers.

It's everything Republinazis find funny. And it's horrible. Seriously. The jokes on any night of the week are sad and demoralizing to anyone with any inch of a soul.

Cullion
28th May 08, 10:34 AM
I don't think I've seen any of his movies. Which of his movies got the most savagely attacked ?

EvilSteve
28th May 08, 10:58 AM
Oh my god- this is the guy who did House of the Dead?

That movie ranks up there with Manos: Hands of Fate as one of the worst ever made.

And trust me, I love shitty horror and sci-fi.

boondock lee
28th May 08, 11:02 AM
Yeah he made house of the dead and alone in the dark, and Bloodrayne

Shawarma
28th May 08, 01:25 PM
I actually thought the trailer somebody posted a while back looked funny.

Terrorist one: Soon, we shall crash this hijacked airliner into America and get our 20 virgins!
Terrorist two: 20? I thought the Imam said 100 virgins.
1: He did? He told me 20. Let's call him and ask.....
2: So, what he say?
1: He said we only get 10 virgins...
2.........Fuck this, let's fly to the Bahamas instead.
1: Allahu Akbar!

socratic
3rd June 08, 04:21 AM
I actually thought the trailer somebody posted a while back looked funny.

Terrorist one: Soon, we shall crash this hijacked airliner into America and get our 20 virgins!
Terrorist two: 20? I thought the Imam said 100 virgins.
1: He did? He told me 20. Let's call him and ask.....
2: So, what he say?
1: He said we only get 10 virgins...
2.........Fuck this, let's fly to the Bahamas instead.
1: Allahu Akbar!

Yeah, it turns out some things aren't actually funny after 7 years. South Park mentioned a mandatory wait-time before a tragedy becomes funny, can't remember the figure, but pretty sure 9/11 is still way below the quota.

Quikfeet509
23rd June 08, 02:06 PM
I actually thought the trailer somebody posted a while back looked funny.

Terrorist one: Soon, we shall crash this hijacked airliner into America and get our 20 virgins!
Terrorist two: 20? I thought the Imam said 100 virgins.
1: He did? He told me 20. Let's call him and ask.....
2: So, what he say?
1: He said we only get 10 virgins...
2.........Fuck this, let's fly to the Bahamas instead.
1: Allahu Akbar!


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The movie is out...anyone seen it? Apparently it isn't getting many screens [duh].




From Uwe Boll:



Now is the time for the world to see “POSTAL” and here are my reasons why:

After the September 11th attacks, our world went through some dramatic changes. We have wars and terror in Afghanistan, Israel, Lebanon, Iraq and various states in Africa. The USA and Europe are scared to loose the leadership of the planet to China and India. Muslim fanatics and fundamentalists are gaining enough power to destroy our security and freedom.

The American and European people are heavily swayed by the mass media that is supporting the USA strategy of resolving these threats through war. We have quickly developed an innate self-censorship in order to survive this crazed and fragile state of existence. People are now afraid to speak their mind for fear of repercussions. If Bin Laden is a crazed fanatic, mass murderer, are we to assume that George Bush is a wonderful leader? If Moslems are perceived as terrorists, then are all Christians and Jews doing the right thing?
The world is in need of a film that is tougher in it's humorous mockery of the globe than "SOUTH PARK". The audience is ready to approach this type of satire with live actors rather than cartoons. "POSTAL" will not accept any form of censorship.

Our present political situation is intolerable. We have deranged religious fanatics on one hand and lobbyists from the oil and weapon industries on the other hand. Both sides are actively working at destroying the planet. This world is slowly dying due to global warming and pollution caused by man’s corporate greed and stupidity. If intelligent people do not stop this madness, then our grandchildren will not experience life.

"POSTAL" will insult all cultures, religions, political groups and leaders. No one will be spared. The film is intended to provoke thought, laughter and open debate. Our world is out of balance and "POSTAL" will reflect just how fucked up we are.

I see myself as a member of the world community. I have no religious affiliation. Religion has often been a catalyst for the many crimes and wars throughout history. Religion allows people the opportunity to blame their actions on a higher source. We live in a world that is sensitive to people's religious beliefs. How ironic that non-religious groups fail to receive the same level of sensitivity from the establishment.

I agree with Salman Rushdie who said a few months ago in an interview something to the affect that we don't want to hurt your feelings because you are religious.… who thinks about the daily insults non-religious people are getting? How can the President of the United States think, that Adam and Eve were created by God, but Darwin is bullshit? How can they teach this in certain American states? This is an insult to everyone with an IQ over 100!

Apart from the firemen and rescuers of 911, how about the victims of the September 11th attacks that are now being labelled as heroes? I say that they were not heroes at all. They died in a terrorist attack. They were normal people and did nothing heroic but dying an unfortunate death.

Since September 11th, more than ONE MILLION AFRICANS, JEWS and ARABS have died in terrorist's attacks, civil wars and wars. Their lives and deaths were not featured by the mass media. Does this mean that their lives had less value than the life of a NY stockbroker dying in the World Trade Centre?

WarPhalange
23rd June 08, 02:28 PM
Fuck. He actually said something useful.