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Keith
3rd August 06, 11:58 PM
Due to suggestions in the "Miami Vice-Little Man?" thread, I have decided to start a public service: I will use my psychic powers (developed from years of focusing my ki in hapkido training) to review movies before they even come out! No longer do you need to fear wasting your money on a stinker, for I can tell you if it's worth it! Just provide me a link to a trailer of any movie about to come out and my psychic powers will do the rest!

Dark Helmet
4th August 06, 10:03 AM
Old school 2.No trailer yet.But with what we remember of the original.What do you predict?

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000681/

Olorin
4th August 06, 11:19 AM
Snakes on a Plane (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0417148/)

I predict that there will be snakes on a plane and that Samuel L. Jackson will kill the snakes. The Internet people will complain that the movie did not live up to the hype, then overnight the once super-hip Snakes on a Plane t-shirts will become kinda lame.

However because of the Internet buzz the movie will make a lot of money. Then on future projects Hollywood will try to reproduce the spontaneous buzz SOAP generated with artificial Buzz for their new movie Gorillas in a Hospital. This will cause the Internet people to wonder what it all means while they slip deeper into Emo like behavior.

WarPhalange
4th August 06, 02:29 PM
Let me save you all some time: They all suck.

There are no good movies coming out these days, period.

The only thing to look forward to is Metalocalypse.

Olorin
4th August 06, 02:59 PM
I hear ya Poop, I have been trying to watch older movies that I never got around to seeing. I rented The Producers (original) and it was great. I also finally sat down and watched Citizen Kane it was a fantastic movie and very depressing, but in a holy shit that was good kind of way. I also watched Young Frankenstein. Sorry to say I was not that impressed, maybe it is one of those movies you have to watch a few times to get the humor. I rented The Jerk. I thought it was pretty funny; you could not get away with some of that humor today, god dam political correctness. I checked out Dead Alive. Now I love Zombie movies but hated this one, did not even finish it. Dai Tenshi loaned me Reefer Madness (the Showtime musical). Very funny, if for no other reason people should watch it just to see Alan Cummings play FDR.

I think I am going to stick to older films and movies my friends recommend for a while. Hollywood is stuck on stupid and TV is nothing but “reality” programs. I do not think that is going to change for some time.

Zendetta
4th August 06, 03:41 PM
I also finally sat down and watched Citizen Kane it was a fantastic movie and very depressing, but in a holy shit that was good kind of way.

Seen much else from the Fat Man? I think Orson Wells is (was) a national treasure. His old film noirs are priceless - I especially like Lady from Shanghai and Touch of Evil (with Chuck Heston as a swarthy Mexican!).


Related: any MAN here who hasn't seen Maltese Falcon is now demoted to Simpering Wuss.

WarPhalange
4th August 06, 05:49 PM
I also watched Young Frankenstein. Sorry to say I was not that impressed, maybe it is one of those movies you have to watch a few times to get the humor. I rented The Jerk. I thought it was pretty funny; you could not get away with some of that humor today, god dam political correctness.

What the fuck is wrong with you? I should have seen "hilarious" twice in that part.

Young Frankenstein was awesome. High Anxiety is another good one.

And The Jerk is by far the best movie in the history of the world. But no, go ahead and watch your fucking Date Movie, your White Chicks, Mr. Deeds, and all that other predictable garbage. You can't handle these movies.

DAYoung
4th August 06, 05:57 PM
I hear ya Poop, I have been trying to watch older movies that I never got around to seeing. I rented The Producers (original) and it was great. I also finally sat down and watched Citizen Kane it was a fantastic movie and very depressing, but in a holy shit that was good kind of way. I also watched Young Frankenstein. Sorry to say I was not that impressed, maybe it is one of those movies you have to watch a few times to get the humor. I rented The Jerk. I thought it was pretty funny; you could not get away with some of that humor today, god dam political correctness. I checked out Dead Alive. Now I love Zombie movies but hated this one, did not even finish it. Dai Tenshi loaned me Reefer Madness (the Showtime musical). Very funny, if for no other reason people should watch it just to see Alan Cummings play FDR.

I think I am going to stick to older films and movies my friends recommend for a while. Hollywood is stuck on stupid and TV is nothing but “reality” programs. I do not think that is going to change for some time.

For a premier old-school performance, check out Charles Laughton in Rembrandt - kitschy but brilliant.

Also: The Third Man, based on Greene's story, and starring Welles. Brilliant noir film.

DAYoung
4th August 06, 05:58 PM
What the fuck is wrong with you? I should have seen "hilarious" twice in that part.

Young Frankenstein was awesome. High Anxiety is another good one.

And The Jerk is by far the best movie in the history of the world. But no, go ahead and watch your fucking Date Movie, your White Chicks, Mr. Deeds, and all that other predictable garbage. You can't handle these movies.

Man with Two Brains.

Keith
4th August 06, 07:57 PM
Old school 2.No trailer yet.But with what we remember of the original.What do you predict?

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000681/
The ki only works if I have a trailer to work from. Meridians and such.

Diggler McFeely
4th August 06, 08:08 PM
I agree with the fat, green elephant that has the pointed tail and horns.

Yiktin Voxbane
4th August 06, 09:09 PM
Flesh for Frankenstein *I need a Nhazoum for my zombie*

Blood for Dracula *the blood of these sluts is killing me*

African Queen :- this one is amazing.

Kiko
5th August 06, 06:52 AM
This thread belongs in the Reviews section! And YF is one of the best and most re-watchable movies of all time!

Steve
5th August 06, 09:20 AM
Man with Two Brains.

Steve Martin wins again.

http://www.movieposter.com/posters/archive/main/15/MPW-7795

Steve
5th August 06, 09:21 AM
And YF is one of the best and most re-watchable movies of all time!

Agreed.

Olorin
5th August 06, 11:42 AM
Seen much else from the Fat Man?

Related: any MAN here who hasn't seen Maltese Falcon is now demoted to Simpering Wuss.

I have not watched many of his films but I have Rear Window up next in my Netflix Queue. Adding Maltese Falcon right now…


This thread belongs in the Reviews section! And YF is one of the best and most re-watchable movies of all time!

The tread got a little derailed when Keith did not follow up. Sorry…

As far as YF, I guess I just need to watch it again.

Zendetta
5th August 06, 01:29 PM
Groovy. THeres another good Bogey/Sam Spade movie, but I'm forgetting its name. As was mentioned before, the Third Man is also great Wellsian noir, but was directed by some Dame (actually, shes great).

Regarding noir and your avatar: a local movie house shows old/cult/bizarre movies alot, and last year played Dirty Harry on the big screen. SWEET.

mrblackmagic
5th August 06, 11:07 PM
Come on, Keith. Don't make me put on the Carnack hat.

Keith
7th August 06, 02:19 PM
Old School 2

Ok, keep in mind that I don't have a trailer to channel the ki through, so my reading may be a bit off.

The jokes for this movie will be recycled jokes from the last movie (but then again what grade-school humor isn't recycled from the 4rth grade or so?). Will Ferrel will run around and act like a jackass. If you liked the last one, you'll probably like this one.

Keith
7th August 06, 02:22 PM
Snakes on a Plane

This movie will be unintentionally hilarious, but ultimately fail to be scary or suspenseful. Don't waste your money; rent it when it comes out.

Dark Helmet
7th August 06, 08:41 PM
Casino Royale
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AdI4j8RzcmY

It looks good.I would probably watch it.but i just don't know.What do you see psychic reader?

Keith
7th August 06, 09:01 PM
Casino Royale

Daniel Craig will be a better Bond than Pierce Brosnan, but still not as good as that Scottish guy, what's-his-name. The movie itself will be typical Bond fair: lots of action, explosions and hot babes. Worth your money if you like that sort of thing.

Dark Helmet
7th August 06, 09:22 PM
Thank god.Because it has knife fighting............and I really like those.

Keith
8th August 06, 01:07 AM
I will probably fork over my own hard-earned cash for this one myself. My psychic powers DO let me know how it's going to end, but the theater has much better sound.

Voompa
8th August 06, 09:18 PM
I watched Young Frankenstein when I was much younger. It introduced me to the phrase "quickie" and I had to ask my mom to explain it to me. I like educational movies. :)

mrblackmagic
8th August 06, 09:30 PM
Oh, great Keith. While Club Dread had its moments, I was rather disappointed. Please lend your great visions to this trailer.

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1809267350/trailer

Neildo
8th August 06, 09:36 PM
Loved Super Troopers. Psyched for Beerfest.

Keith
9th August 06, 12:33 AM
Beerfest

The reading is a bit fuzzy on this one, but then again perhaps I have partaken in a bit too much of the sweet amber myself. I'm going to have to give this one the "spend money in the theater" approval. It won't live up to the comic genius that is Supertroopers (gotta love the DVD with the out takes of Fava vomiting), but it's hard to top that.

EuropIan
9th August 06, 06:46 AM
Has any one seen this movie?
http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1808715948/trailer

Seems to be one of the better horror flicks out now. Or so I have heard.

Keith
9th August 06, 01:54 PM
The Descent

This movie wants to be Alien SO bad, but fails. It tries to make up for it in gore. Wait for rental.

Zendetta
10th August 06, 08:01 PM
I liked Descent, but it was no Alien.

DAYoung
11th August 06, 03:03 AM
I liked Descent, but it was no Alien.

Game over, man.

http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/c/c8/180px-Bpaxton.jpg