View Full Version : fun fotos (Warning, may contain material that is offensive to Capt. Shady)

27th August 04, 10:11 AM



27th August 04, 10:14 AM



27th August 04, 10:16 AM
whoever that drew guy is, he's pretty funny

27th August 04, 10:25 AM



27th August 04, 10:27 AM




27th August 04, 10:42 AM
Despite initial claims that the ship was too far out to sea for a helicopter landing, forcing the president to use a jet, the Lincoln was actually within helicopter range when Mr. Bush arrived.

The jet flight was much more dramatic than a helicopter arrival would have been, as the president took the control stick for part of the flight and emerged on deck wearing a flight suit and helmet.

In addition, Pentagon officials told the Washington Post that after the president's speech, the Lincoln waited offshore for hours while he slept rather than heading into port after its 10-month voyage.

Media strategists noted afterward that Mr. Sforza and his aides had choreographed every aspect of the event, even down to the members of the Lincoln crew arrayed in coordinated shirt colors over Mr. Bush's right shoulder and the "Mission Accomplished" banner placed to perfectly capture the president and the celebratory two words in a single shot. The speech was specifically timed for what image makers call "magic hour light," which cast a golden glow on Mr. Bush.

"If you looked at the TV picture, you saw there was flattering light on his left cheek and slight shadowing on his right," Mr. King said. "It looked great."

White House officials had said, both before and after Bush's landing in a Navy S-3B Viking jet, that he took the plane solely to avoid inconveniencing the sailors, who were returning home after a deployment of nearly 10 months. The officials said that Bush decided not to wait until the ship was in helicopter range to avoid delaying the troops' homecoming.

But instead of the carrier being hundreds of miles offshore, as aides had said it would be, the Lincoln was only about 30 miles from the coast when Bush made his "tail-hook" landing, in which the jet was stopped by cables on deck. Navy officers slowed and turned the ship when land became visible.

Citing Fleischer's revised explanation, Rep. Henry A. Waxman (D-Calif.) wrote to the General Accounting Office to ask for a "full accounting" of the cost of the trip.

After Fleischer's remarks, Sen. Robert C. Byrd (D-W.Va.) delivered an impassioned speech on the Senate floor, saying he was "deeply troubled" by Bush's actions, which he called "flamboyant showmanship." The octogenarian lawmaker criticized the White House for using the carrier "as an advertising backdrop" and the military "as stage props" for Bush's speech.

"The "Mission Accomplished" sign, of course, was put up by the members of the USS Abraham Lincoln, saying that their mission was accomplished. I know it was attributed some how to some ingenious advance man from my staff -- they weren't that ingenious, by the way." - G W Bush

Gen. Wesley Clark made the following statement:

"Today, President Bush backtracked on his May 1 political photo op on the U.S.S. Abraham Lincoln by blaming the troops on the aircraft carrier for the declaration of 'mission accomplished' in Iraq. This is wrong, this is irresponsible and this is not leadership. Politicizing the mission of those troops in the first place was bad theater, and diminished the office of Commander in Chief -- but to now turn his comments on those very troops is outrageous. Instead of trying to blame the sailors and soldiers, the President owes our troops in harm's way and the American people a plan to bring peace to Iraq and stability to the region." http://clark04.com/press/release/047/



27th August 04, 10:51 AM

27th August 04, 10:53 AM

27th August 04, 10:54 AM

27th August 04, 10:57 AM
I like the illustrations from both sides of the fence. We have needed some humor over here lately!:)

27th August 04, 11:06 AM
I wasn't even going to post anything because i didn't feel like looking for it but that shit was on another page I just happened to go over to.

27th August 04, 11:09 AM



27th August 04, 11:12 AM
I can't wait for the American election to be over.

27th August 04, 12:35 PM
After the election we will have to spend our time talking about the Canadian "Mad Cows".:)

27th August 04, 12:41 PM




Deadpan Scientist
27th August 04, 01:34 PM
Pat, no cut and paste articles without at least 3 or 4 lines of your own thoughts(as per policy)

First and only warning.

27th August 04, 01:36 PM
Originally posted by brandeissansoo
Pat, no cut and paste articles without at least 3 or 4 lines of your own thoughts(as per policy)

First and only warning.

I don't have a problem with the policy, but I thought it was null and void with the forming of this fora?

27th August 04, 02:19 PM
I think the Budget chart says it all doesn't it? Bush is leading us right down the toilet.

27th August 04, 02:23 PM
I seriously can't wait for this election to be over.

The Mad Hatter
27th August 04, 05:17 PM
I am with you Boyd. The past two national elections have been nothing more than a battle between crappy, mediocre candidates. Bush and Gore offered nothing real and tangible in 2000, in 2004 Bush and Kerry are washing, rinsing, and repeating.

How about we actually get TALENTED and charismatic people in the offices in stead of dead crappy ones.

27th August 04, 08:33 PM
Originally posted by brandeissansoo
Pat, no cut and paste articles without at least 3 or 4 lines of your own thoughts(as per policy)

First and only warning.

Well actually it's the second, at least, but I will pay more attention. It sunk in my soft brain to not start a thread based on paste...


27th August 04, 08:39 PM
I notice that Capt. Shady is so fucked up that he keeps posting the same stuff over and over. He's not drunk or on drugs, though. It's that he's so tired from his new workout sessions, inspired by his Grass Roots Texas Throwdown and subsequent evil trolling by Deus. He's turning from man-marshmallow to he-male-thunder-fist, ready to hit the mats and hit them hard. Anything would be better than fighting on Texas fire ants and cactus like he's used to.




27th August 04, 08:50 PM



Deadpan Scientist
27th August 04, 08:53 PM
Originally posted by CaptShady
I don't have a problem with the policy, but I thought it was null and void with the forming of this fora?
It still applies

27th August 04, 08:55 PM



27th August 04, 08:57 PM

28th August 04, 12:17 PM
Originally posted by patfromlogan

HAHAHAHAHA so freaking true. I cant wait till the 2008 election hopefully someone good will run.

Sun Wukong
28th August 04, 10:57 PM

I love goats.com. These guys are so funny it almost makes me forget that he really is the president.

Sun Wukong
28th August 04, 11:01 PM



Please forgive the repitition, but I figured it deserved a second time around. Bush and Dick... how did we go from the presidency to porno? Leave it to Bush to give human decency and honest an X rating in the US.

Sun Wukong
28th August 04, 11:13 PM


Goats.com rules. I'd wish I could come up with something more poetic than that but the truth is I'm just getting my cheap shots in without fear of Administrative Reprisal.

28th August 04, 11:16 PM
The past two national elections have been nothing more than a battle between crappy, mediocre candidates.

More like every election since Hoover-Roosevelt...

Sun Wukong
28th August 04, 11:33 PM
Bush's Top Ten Reasons for not finding Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq.

10. "We've only looked through 99% of the country"

9. "We spent entire budget making those playing cards"

8. "Containers are labeled in some crazy language"

7. "They must have been stolen by some of them evil X-Men mutants"

6. "Did I say Iraq has weapons of mass destruction? I meant they have goats"

5. "How are we supposed to find weapons of mass destruction when we can't even find Cheney?"

4. "Still screwed up because of Daylight Savings Time"

3. "When you're trying to find something, it's always in the last place you look, am I right, people?"

2. "Let's face it -- I ain't exactly a genius"

1. "Geraldo took them

David Letterman: is he a republican, is he independent? Who the hell knows. He IS one funny mother fucker.

Sun Wukong
28th August 04, 11:35 PM
Choke? I hope you don't consider Roosevelt a mediocore president.

28th August 04, 11:39 PM
No, I'm saying he was the last guy who WASN'T mediocre.

30th August 04, 09:12 AM



30th August 04, 09:29 AM
Well at least you posted new stuff. Too bad it's dull. Here's another republican hero:


Need we say more??


30th August 04, 09:50 AM

WASHINGTON (AP) - On Thursday, Laura Bush (Pickles) announced that President Bush (Monkey Pants) would ask for an $18 million increase in funds for the National Endowment for the Arts. All but $3 million of the increase will go to create a new program called "Velvet Elvis: Three Decades of Artistic Genius," which will include a mix of touring performances, local presentations and arts education in partnership with public and private organizations across the country.
"The goal of this compassionate program is for every trailer and shanty in American to have its very own special Velvet Elvis painting. God bless Elvis Presley! Thank you, said Mrs. Bush.


http://static.sky.com/images/pictures/1155291.jpg "It hurt in a way that people would make up stories that they had no truth about." And she said it was "wrong" for the US government to use her as a "symbol" for the war.

30th August 04, 09:58 AM


30th August 04, 10:14 AM

It is telling that the ground commanders in Baghdad who participated in the raid on Chalabi headquarters did not bother to inform their chain-of-command higher-ups at the Pentagon. For the hard-liners at the Defense Department, the raid came as a surprise. Donald Rumsfeld, Paul Wolfowitz and Douglas Feith, got the news from the media. When Iraqi police, guarded by American GIs, burst into the home and offices of Ahmad Chalabi...

Here's Chalabi with Rummy and Wolfy:


30th August 04, 01:48 PM
HAHA I cant believe we based our pre-war intelligence on people who are not realiable.

30th August 04, 02:11 PM
Originally posted by PizDoff
I can't wait for the American election to be over.

Seconded, Thirded, Fourthed, fifthed, etc...

30th August 04, 07:22 PM
Hey punks, if you don't like reading about American politics, then don't read about American politics. Of course American politics don't extend to that vast wasteland to the north, known for good beer, fuckable French honeys, and dull politeness. You guys should (but won't, because you are dullards, and like 37% of Americans, don't read literature -sports and comix don't count) read http://www.dfw.com/mld/startelegram/news/columnists/molly_ivins/9380461.htm, for one of the most clever American women writers and pundits, giving her view of "These nice Canadians, whom George W. Bush once managed to triumphantly identify as "our most important neighbors to the north..."

here's Molly on Canada:
"Canada, Land of the Understatement. I once proposed that their national motto should be: "Now, Let's Not Get Excited." Not that I would ever generalize. I attribute their commendable phlegm to being too cold to waste much energy and regular ingestion of oatmeal.

Nice, polite, calm, reserved, chock-full of common sense and living next to us -- what a fate. For them, it's like having the Simpsons for next-door neighbors."

Now my indoctrinated friends, who is the black woman on the right of Jessica?


Here she is again:


and here's old what's her face with Jessica:


Well they might not be white and cute, but they are the African-American Shoshana Johnson, held 22 days by Iraqis and shot through both ankles, and Lori Piestewa, Hopi mother of two killed in the same action that injured Jessica.

30th August 04, 08:02 PM
George W. Bush once managed to triumphantly identify as "our most important neighbors to the north..."

Most of Europe is north of the US.

But they can think of no polite way of asking if we are such freaking idiots that we haven't noticed the damage that has been done by the Bush administration to the American reputation all over the world.

But that isn't saying Kerry wouldn't we worse for Canada with his protectionism.

Of the many stupid things that our country has done lately, alienating the best neighbor any country ever had ranks fairly high on the All-Time Stupid list.

And think how much WORSE Gore would've been as he continued Clinton's policy of fucking us in the ass on trade...

Lot of ranchers, oil-and-gas men, conservative if not right-wing, a big anti-environmental movement -- just like home.


Same deal: timber industry, mining, all the extractive industries and hunters all lined up against environmentalists,


who are outmanned and outgunned but perceived to have the federal government on their side.

This is fucking BULLSHIT, the current government approved Kyoto, which will buttfuck Alberta. Furthermore the Liberals in Ottawa have also fucked with hunters (gun registry, yes, to own a gun legally, the government must know not only that you have a picture ID ownership and acquisition license, and a 30 hour [at least] safety course as a prerequisite for that, no you must register each individual gun, at a huge cost to tax payers, or face confiscation of your firearms...this even applies to some pellet guns) and conservatives (they wouldn't allow a free vote in the House of Commons on gay marriage because the backbench of their own party would have lost them the vote).

30th August 04, 11:22 PM
Originally posted by I Choke You
Most of Europe is north of the US.

What the hell?? Are you nuts?? I mean that is so obviously not the point...

But that isn't saying Kerry wouldn't we worse for Canada with his protectionism.

This is actually an issue that my friends were discussing in some depth the other day. They claimed it was not protectionism that they want, it is structuring the tax laws to give benefits to firms and factories in the US, rather than giving tax breaks to off shore job movement.

And think how much WORSE Gore would've been as he continued Clinton's policy of fucking us in the ass on trade...

Gee, Clinton would fuck anyone, wouldn't he? I thought NAFTA was harmful (major environmental deregulation tied to international trade law,death of local economies with globalization - the Wallmarting of the world etc), and NAFTA was done under Clinton's term, but isn't the current battle over Canadian lumber tarriffs being promoted by Bush??

30th August 04, 11:44 PM

Sun Wukong
30th August 04, 11:53 PM
Bush Jokes...

"Today, the United Nations approved a resolution to lift the sanctions against Iraq. ... Yeah, the move will allow Iraqis to buy things they don't have, such as medicine and weapons of mass destruction." -Conan O'Brien

"The Pentagon said this week that the war in Iraq has cost $20 billion so far. The breakdown is operations: $10 billion; personnel: $6 billion; getting Bush re-elected: priceless." -Bill Maher

"All over Baghdad, Iraqi looters have been breaking into banks and walking out with millions of dollars in Iraqi money. As a result, they now qualify for President Bush's tax cut." -Conan O'Brien

"In Iraq, the U.S. military's whack-a-mole approach to killing Saddam Hussein may have finally paid off. ... The bombs destroyed the area and left behind a 60-foot crater, or as coalition forces prefer to call it: a freedom hole." -Jon Stewart

"White House Press Secretary Ari Fleischer said that while President Bush is monitoring the situation in Iraq, he is leaving the day-to-day decision making to the military experts. First they kick Geraldo out, then we rescued that female soldier, now we find out Bush isn't making the decisions. No wonder the stock market went up today." -Jay Leno

"Officials at the White House are saying that President Bush hasn't changed his schedule much since the war started. The main difference, they say, is that he's started watching the news and taping Sponge Bob." -Conan O'Brien

"The U.S. army confirmed that it gave a lucrative fire fighting contract in Iraq to the firm once run by the Vice President Dick Cheney without any competitive bidding. When asked if this could be conceived as Cheney's friends profiting from the war, the spokesman said 'Yes.'" -Conan O'Brien

"The Pentagon still has not given a name to the Iraqi war. Somehow 'Operation Re-elect Bush' doesn't seem to be popular." -Jay Leno

"New rumors that Saddam Hussein is planning to flee to a castle in Libya with 10 billion dollars. Now President Bush doesn't know whether to nuke him or give him a tax cut." -Craig Kilborn

"President Bush announced tonight that he believes in democracy and that democracy can exist in Iraq. They can have a strong economy, they can have a good health care plan, and they can have a free and fair voting. Iraq? We can't even get this in Florida." -Jay Leno

"President Bush has said that he does not need approval from the UN to wage war, and I'm thinking, well, hell, he didn't need the approval of the American voters to become president, either." -David Letterman

"Democrats were quick to point out that President Bush's budget creates a 1 trillion dollar deficit. The White House quickly responded with 'Hey, look over there, it's Saddam Hussein.'" -Craig Kilborn

"As we head to war with Iraq, President Bush wants to make one thing clear: This war is not about oil, it's about gasoline." -Jay Leno

"In a speech earlier today President Bush said if Iraq gets rid of Saddam Hussein, he will help the Iraqi people with food, medicine, supplies, housing, education ĘC anything that's needed. Isn't that amazing? He finally comes up with a domestic agenda ĘC and it's for Iraq. Maybe we could bring that here if it works out." -Jay Leno

"President Bush said this Iraq situation looks like 'the rerun of a bad movie.' Well sure, there's a Bush in the White House, the economy's going to hell, we're going to war over oil. I've seen this movie, haven't I?" -Jay Leno

Below are older jokes from before the last election:

How many George Bushes does it take to change a lightbulb?
2 , 1 to change it and 1 to lethally inject the old lightbulb. (from Valerie, Thanks!)

Why does George W. Bush keep his fly open? (from Sharon, Thanks!)
A: In case he has to count to eleven.
So why doesn't he just use his toes?
A: Because going barefoot in public would be embarrassing.

A club in New York has designated every Tuesday night until the election "Bush Jr. Night." You get in free if your parents call and make your reservation.

Q: What were George W. Bush's three hardest years? A: Second grade.

Bush's original idea for a campaign slogan - "Reform 'N Stuff."

George W. Bush said he is going to run his own campaign and be his own man. The amazing thing is he said this while his father was drinking a glass of water.

A touching father and son moment:
BUSH Sr.: Read my nose: no new taxes.
BUSH Jr: Er ..... Isn't that's meant to be "Read my lips."
BUSH Sr.: No, Son. If they watch my lips, they'll see that I'm lying through my teeth. Read my nose, no new taxes.

What did Mickey Mouse get for Christmas?
A George W. Bush watch.

How can you tell George W. Bush apart from a cow? By the wise look in its eyes.

(Warning, the following was actually a Dan Quayle quote, but why think up new Bush material when we can just recycle all the Quayle stuff) "Julian Bond, speaking at a Big Eight Conference on Black Student Government at the University of Colorado Feb 18 had this to say about George W. Bush: 'He thinks Roe v. Wade are options for crossing the Potomac.'"

What's the difference George Bush and a chimpanzee? One has nearly the mental abilities of a human child and the other likes to eat bananas.

George Bush on his upbringing- "Our parents were of Midwestern stock and very strict. They didn't want us to grow up to be spoiled and rich. If we left our tennis racquets in the rain, we were punished." (not a real quote)

Top 5 Bush Pickup lines in college :
5. "Is that a false nose?"
4. "You look like a hooker I knew in Fresno."
3. "I'm drunk."
2. "You're ugly but you intrigue me."
1. "I had to find out what kind of woman would go out dressed like that."

Pat Buchanan, Newt Gingrich, & George W. Bush are in a boat in the middle of the ocean. The boat is sinking. Who gets saved? The American People!

What is a Bush supporter? What the governor wears under his swimming trunks.

A Bush foreign policy idea designed to win over minority voters - Appoint a black man as ambassador to the Bermuda Triangle.

Why will they bury George W. Bush face down? So he can see where he is going.

How many George Bushs does it take to change a lightbulb? Three. One to change the lightbulb, one to promise he'll do it better than anyone else, and one to obscure the issues.

How can you tell if George W. Bush is lying? His lips are moving.

How many Bush supporters does it take to change a light bulb? Six, one to turn the bulb and five to create a related tax loophole for the rich .

What happens when you cross James Dean with George Bush? You get a rebel without a clue.

Seen on a rest room wall in Houston: If you voted for George Bush, you can't shit here...your asshole is in Austin.

George Bush Jr.
Georgy Porgy pudding and pie, Took cocaine which made him high, When the sheriff came his way, Georgy's pa sent him away.
Georgy Porgy wasn't daft, Wanted to avoid the draft, He found being a coward not too hard, Daddy's friends got him into the guard.
Georgy Porgy businessman With daddy's money his career began, When the seed money all dried up, Georgy's business went belly up.
Georgy Porgy governor guy Brought the crime rate up so high, And that was not his only solution, Texas is number one on pollution.
Georgy Porgy for President, Does not know where the money all went. But if he has to fight Al Gore, His daddy's friends will get him more.
Georgy Porgy's a true Texan, Though he may fail again and again, As long as his father has wealthy friends, He'll do to us, what he did to them.

Sun Wukong
30th August 04, 11:56 PM

This joke is a little dumb but then again, so is the president.

31st August 04, 01:05 AM
They claimed it was not protectionism that they want, it is structuring the tax laws to give benefits to firms and factories in the US, rather than giving tax breaks to off shore job movement.

But that isn't what Kerry or certainly Edwards wants...they want to continue the Clinton policy: Fuck thy neighbour as thyself...

but isn't the current battle over Canadian lumber tarriffs being promoted by Bush??

Actually this battle has been going on for years...as in back into the Clinton administration...Bush has done nothing but help Canada on trade issues...Clinton fucked us on salmon, on timber, etc...my province has done better since Bush took office...Clinton never did us any good.

1st September 04, 09:19 AM
Originally posted by chris_ketchens
Pat Buchanan, Newt Gingrich, & George W. Bush are in a boat in the middle of the ocean. The boat is sinking. Who gets saved? The American People!

That can be changed from Pat and Newt to Dick Cheney and Rumsfeld...

Lick Bush!
Beat Dick!

1st September 04, 10:03 AM

25th March 08, 08:40 PM
I'd forgotten this old thread, but now that I'm here......

Pat Bagley is the greatgrandson of Brigham Young and a great mind




Yiktin Voxbane
25th March 08, 08:46 PM

26th March 08, 02:14 AM
How dare you remind me of my youthful stupidity, pat! HOW DARE YOU.

26th March 08, 09:20 PM
The past two national elections have been nothing more than a battle between crappy, mediocre candidates.

Well well well

8th April 08, 10:13 PM

Iraq veterans accused of murder

The VA estimates that more than 5,000 veterans take their lives each year. Suicide rates are 35 percent higher for Iraq veterans than for the general population. And the Department of Defense recently reported that the Army is now seeing the highest rate of suicide since the Vietnam War. http://www.iowaindependent.com/showDiary.do?diaryId=968





8th April 08, 10:17 PM
It's not murder, it's war.

8th April 08, 10:43 PM
No, they are accused of murder in the US

"Suicide rates are 35 percent higher for Iraq veterans than for the general population."

8th April 08, 10:53 PM

On Good Morning America,
RADDATZ: Two-thirds of Americans say it's not worth fighting.



8th April 08, 11:03 PM
http://newswhitehouse.com/vice%20president%20cheney%20denounced%20by%20bush% 20to%20be%20fall%20guy%20angry%202007%20News%20Whi te%20House%20com.jpg

8th April 08, 11:46 PM

Mr. Chalabi's group has received at least $27 million in United States financing in the past four years, an Iraqi National Congress official said earlier this week. This includes $335,000 a month as part of a classified program through the Defense Intelligence Agency, since the summer of 2002, to help gather intelligence in Iraq.

Internal reviews by the United States government have found that much of the information provided as part of the classified program before American forces invaded Iraq last year was useless, misleading or even fabricated.


8th April 08, 11:51 PM
Ahmed Chalabi in conference with Joe Allbaugh, Donald Rumsfeld, Paul Wolfowitz and Dick Cheney. Discussions include the New Bridge Strategies disbursal of funds for rebuilding Iraq through the next fiscal year. Strategies are going according to plan as Chalabi has advised. Joe M. Allbaugh, Chairman and Director of New Bridge Strategies, LLC has the green light to spend on rebuilding the palaces of Saddam Hussein in order to provide a suitable environment for VIP's of the chosen; consultants, contractors and interested parties tapped to share in the contribution to Iraqi rehabilitation. Chalabi, now settled and comfortable in his sitting room, has referbished one of Saadams places to suit his tastes for diplomatic receptions and business conferences. "A comfortable working environment is important when dealing with the infrastructure, yes, I need some modicum of order when attending to the needs of the Iraqi people, despensing power and seeing to the construction of democracy." Chalabi said, "Our Democratic institutions are being built from the top down in order to save time and insure there are no insurgent elements infiltrating our idea of a free Iraq.

Ahmad Chalabi in perception management conference
The close friend of Dick Cheney has made over one of Saddam's Palaces as his own. Petit Pale Chalabi is lush with decor. A man of sophisticated tastes, Ahmed Chalabi has brought in feng shui (gay eye) metrosexual decorators from New York thanks to The Rendon Group and New Bridge Strategies