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View Full Version : Things you have to believe to be a Republican today



Balloonknot
27th August 04, 07:50 AM
As you can see from my fun little list, the republican party has now just become a FLIP-FLOP party. Lies, deceit, double-standards, and corruption. This is what the REAL republican party represents today......................


Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy
when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when
Cheney did business with him, and a bad guy when Bush
needed a "We can't find Bin Laden" diversion".

Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is
communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital
to a spirit of international harmony.

The United States should get out of the United
Nations, and our highest national priority is
enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own
body, but multi-national corporations can make
decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals
and Hillary Clinton.

The best way to improve military morale is to praise
the troops in speeches while slashing veterans'
benefits and combat pa y.

If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't
have sex.

A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our
long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and
money.

Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy.
Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests
of the public at heart.

Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk
science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

A president lying about an extramarital affair is an
impeachable offense.

A president lying to enlist support for a war in which
thousands die is solid defense policy.

Government should limit itself to the powers named in
the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages
and censoring the Internet.

The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle
trades, but George Bush's driving and military record
is none of our business.

Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime,
unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an
illness, and you need our prayers for your recovery.

You support states' rights, which means Attorney
General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter
initiatives they have the right to adopt.

What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital
national interest, but what George Bush did in the
'80s is irrelevant.

Friends don't let friends vote Republican.

Sent in the spirit of patriotism, and in the belief of
"Like father, like son" (ie, one-term only!),

Chupacabra
27th August 04, 07:54 AM
http://www.strangecosmos.com/images/content/15626.gif

CaptShady
27th August 04, 08:03 AM
Drug addiction is a disease that should be treated with compassion and understanding...unless the addict is a Conservative talk show host.


The United States should be subservient to the United Nations. Our highest authority is not God and the U.S. Constitution, but a collective of tinpot dictators (and their appeasers) and the U.N. charter.


Government should relax drug laws regardless of the potential for abuse, but should pass new and unConstitutional anti-gun laws because of the potential for abuse.


Calls for increased security after a terrorist attack are "political opportunism," but calls for more gun control after a criminal's spree killing is "a logical solution."


"It Takes a Village" means everything you want it to mean...except creeping socialist government involvement in the nuclear family.


Disarming innocent, law-abiding citizens helps protect them from evil, lawless terrorists and other thugs.


Slowly killing an unborn innocent by tearing it apart limb from limb is good. Slowly killing an innocent disabled woman by starving her to death is good. Quickly killing terrorists, convicted murderers and rapists is BAD.


Every religion should be respected and promoted in public schools the name of diversity, so long as that religion isn't Christianity.


The best way to support our troops is to criticize their every move. This will let them know they're thought of often.


Sexual harassment, groping and drug use are degenerate if you're the governor of California, but it's okay if you're the President of the United States.


Sex education should be required so that teens can make informed choices about sex, but gun education should be banned because it will turn those same teens into maniacal mass-murderers.


Minorities are blameless for the hatred of the racist; women are blameless for the hatred of the rapist; but America is entirely at fault for the hatred of Islamofascists.


Poverty is the cause of all terrorism...which is why the leaders of al Qaeda are typically U.S.-educated and were raised in wealth and luxury.


The Patriot Act is a horrific compromise of Constitutional rights, but anti-Second Amendment laws and Franklin Roosevelt's Presidential Order 9066 must be regarded "reasonable precautions."


We should unquestioningly honor the wishes of our age-old allies, even when said allies no longer act like our allies and have vested economic interests in propping up our enemies.


Socialized medicine is the ideal. Nevermind all those people who spend every dime they have to get to the United States so they can get quality medical care...that their nation's socialized medical community can't provide.


Michael Moore, Noam Chomsky and Natalie Maines are perfectly qualified to criticize our leadership, but Arnold Schwarzenegger, Charlton Heston, and Dennis Miller are just ignorant political hacks.


John Lott's research on how gun ownership reduces crime is junk science, but Michael Bellesiles is still an authority on why gun control is good (even though he was forced to resign from Emory due to research misconduct over his book "Arming America").


Bush's toppling the Saddam regime was a "diversion," but Clinton's lobbing a couple of cruise missiles at Iraq in the thick of the Lewinsky sex scandal was "sending a message."


A president who lies under oath is okay, but a president who references sixteen words from an allies' intelligence report should be dragged through the streets naked.


Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning Second Amendment rights and shopping the courts for judges sympathetic to causes that wouldn't pass in any legislature.


"The People" in the First Amendment means The People; "the People" in the Fourth Amendment means The People; "the People" in the Ninth Amendment means The People; "the People" in the Tenth Amendment means The People; but "the People" in the Second Amendment (ratified in 1791) means the National Guard (created by an Act of Congress in 1903).


You support a woman's "right to choose" to kill her unborn child, but don't believe that same woman is competent enough to homeschool the children she bears.


Proven draft-dodging is irrelevant, but baseless claims of AWOL status is crucial to national security.


Threatening to boycott Dr. Laura's and Rush Limbaugh's advertisers is exercising Freedom of Speech, but threatening to boycott CBS's "The Reagans" and Liberal actors over their asinine anti-American remarks is censorship and McCarthyist blacklisting.

Chupacabra
27th August 04, 08:08 AM
The Real Dangers of Soda to You and Your Children


By Dr. Joseph Mercola
with Rachael Droege

How many sodas have you had today? How about your kids? The average American drinks an estimated 56 gallons of soft drinks each year, but before you grab that next can of soda, consider this: one can of soda has about 10 teaspoons of sugar, 150 calories, 30 to 55 mg of caffeine, and is loaded with artificial food colors and sulphites.

This is an alarming amount of sugar, calories and harmful additives in a product that has absolutely no nutritional value. Plus, studies have linked soda to osteoporosis, obesity, tooth decay and heart disease. Despite this, soda accounts for more than one-quarter of all drinks consumed in the United States.

Teenagers and children, who many soft drinks are marketed toward, are among the largest consumers. In the past 10 years, soft drink consumption among children has almost doubled in the United States. Teenage boys now drink, on average, three or more cans of soda per day, and 10 percent drink seven or more cans a day. The average for teenage girls is more than two cans a day, and 10 percent drink more than five cans a day.

While these numbers may sound high, theyíre not surprising considering that most school hallways are lined with vending machines that sell, of course, soft drinks. Itís not uncommon for schools to make marketing deals with leading soft drink companies such as Coca-Cola from which they receive commissions--based on a percentage of sales at each school--and sometimes a lump-sum payment.

The revenues are used for various academic and after-school activities, but what activity could be worth devastating the studentsí health, which is exactly what consuming all that soda is doing? Getting rid of vending machines in schools--or replacing their contents with pure water and healthy snacks--could make a big difference, as vending machines can increase the consumption of sweetened beverages by up to 50 or more cans of soda per student per year.

Letís take a look at some of the major components of a can of soda:

Phosphoric Acid: May interfere with the body's ability to use calcium, which can lead to osteoporosis or softening of the teeth and bones. Phosphoric acid also neutralizes the hydrochloric acid in your stomach, which can interfere with digestion, making it difficult to utilize nutrients.

Sugar: Soft drink manufacturers are the largest single user of refined sugar in the United States. It is a proven fact that sugar increases insulin levels, which can lead to high blood pressure, high cholesterol, heart disease, diabetes, weight gain, premature aging and many more negative side effects. Most sodas include over 100 percent of the RDA of sugar.

Aspartame: This chemical is used as a sugar substitute in diet soda. There are over 92 different health side effects associated with aspartame consumption including brain tumors, birth defects, diabetes, emotional disorders and epilispsy/seizures. Further, when aspartame is stored for long periods of time or kept in warm areas it changes to methanol, an alcohol that converts to formaldehyde and formic acid, which are known carcinogens.

Caffeine: Caffeinated drinks cause jitters, insomnia, high blood pressure, irregular heartbeat, elevated blood cholesterol levels, vitamin and mineral depletion, breast lumps, birth defects, and perhaps some forms of cancer.

Tap Water: I recommend that everyone avoid drinking tap water because it can carry any number of chemicals including chlorine, trihalomethanes, lead, cadmium, and various organic pollutants. Tap water is the main ingredient in bottled soft drinks.

Soda is one of the main reasons, nutritionally speaking, why many people suffer health problems. Aside from the negative effects of the soda itself, drinking a lot of soda is likely to leave you with little appetite for vegetables, protein and other food that your body needs.

If you are still drinking soda, stopping the habit is an easy way to improve your health. Pure water is a much better choice. If you must drink a carbonated beverage, try sparkling mineral water.

Xango
27th August 04, 11:43 AM
Alarmist, but anything that encourages people to stop drinking soda is not going to get a detailed critique by yours truly.

Suffice to say many of the assertions are dubious, but it adds up to the fundamental point that American soft drinks do hellacious things to your body.

As for the Republicocratioetc....FUCK YOUR MOTHER

PeedeeShaolin
27th August 04, 12:07 PM
Obesity is officially the #1 killer in America, beating even cigarretes out. People need to reevaluate their eating habits.

And I kow something you need to believe in order to be a Republican: Smoking is GOOD for you!

Guess who the #1 contributor to the Republican party is?

Phillip Morris. The largest and most profitable drug dealer in the known world. Offering ADDICTING cancer to kids everywhere so they too can grow up to lay in a hospitol bed and allow my taxes to pay for treatment necessary because of their stupidity.

Balloonknot
27th August 04, 12:12 PM
Thanks for that info PeeDee, I wasn't aware of that. I'll be using that one. Cigarettes and Alcohol are legal and kill millions of people a year, yet marijuana is evil and will lead to shooting up heroin!! What a joke.

Nihilanthic
27th August 04, 12:18 PM
lol, I was pissed off about those treatment centers giving all that damn money to the GOP...

I have to admit Philip Morris has killed a LOT more teenagers than that damn behavior mod. industry has :(

Strong Machine
27th August 04, 09:25 PM
Then again, look at it this way.
Tobacco and alcohol are legal and kill FAR more people than much more powerful drugs that are illegal do.
So we should make the illegal drugs legal?
I think your conclusions are a bit warped.
I have no opinion on what drugs should or shouldnt be legal, I really couldn;t care less about the topic.
But logic suggests something other than what you guys imply.

ICY
28th August 04, 12:41 AM
The thing is...democrats are never going to make weed legal or get rid of tobacco...there are a few good things the dems do that is good and a million things that are bad...same goes for the republicans, but the republicans have Bush, and I like him.

knight_errant
28th August 04, 07:00 AM
Ballonknot
http://justice.loyola.edu/~mcoffey/ce/c2/bushes.jpg
The bush is over there.

Peter H.
28th August 04, 09:14 AM
Originally posted by PeedeeShaolin
Obesity is officially the #1 killer in America, beating even cigarretes out. People need to reevaluate their eating habits.

And I kow something you need to believe in order to be a Republican: Smoking is GOOD for you!

Guess who the #1 contributor to the Republican party is?

Phillip Morris. The largest and most profitable drug dealer in the known world. Offering ADDICTING cancer to kids everywhere so they too can grow up to lay in a hospitol bed and allow my taxes to pay for treatment necessary because of their stupidity.

Really? According to OpenSecrets, Altria Group, the Parent Company of Phillip Morris, while historically very pro-republican, has evenly split their donations for this election, and they are #11 on the top donors list, the American Medical Association has given more money to Republicans.

And if you look at the top donators, only 2 of the top ten are not Unions, one is the AMA and the other is NAR (who split money pretty evenly), and all of the unions are all pro-democrat.